Left For Dead -Lief Snow-

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

TABLE MADE BY SOCKMONKEY OF CAUTION 2.0.

[atrb=border,0,true] Magnus wondered how about he was going to do this, although he had been reconsidering this moment over and over for years. Then again, he had thought about turning around before, wondering if this was even worth it to try to talk to his father. Lief Snow was the male he was informed that was his father, although his mother really hadn’t told him why he was not around because she seemed too pained to tell him. Although, Magnus had simply assumed his father left his mother and him before he grew up. He never considered any other reason, but he certainly wanted to rub it in his father’s face. He would not just simply overlook how his father had missed his childhood, how he had not been there for him or his mother. Magnus could not but help to be slightly bitter about all of this. Magnus went up to the bar, ordering a beer and downing it right away, honestly wanting something running through his system for the moment to give him some sort of extra push. He figured this might end badly, and that means there would be other people watching unfortunately. His eyes wandered over to Lief who was sitting in the corner, always having wondered what he had gotten from his father really. He never pictured his father being like Lief. He just wondered what he sounded like, what he was like, how he’d react. On a subconscious level, he wanted Lief to love him, to be there for him, and then also partially to feel bad for not being there. He had nothing left to lose though in this moment as he just knew either way he was without a father for the moment and perhaps he would never have one. He then walked over to where Lief was sitting, and sat down without a word then, eyes resting on his father’s face, partially from just shock of being where he was and the other from just being nervous. He murmured, ”Mmm, hey father.” He finally let the words out, eyes dark on his, unwavering as he simply was motionless except for the slight rise and fall of his chest. [/style][style=width: 450px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; text-align: center; color: #000000; line-height: 80%; float: right; position: relative; top: -40px; left: -58px; margin-bottom: -100px;]for my dearest cuppy <3.

[LIEF LEON SNOW]

lief wasn't in a very good mood at the moment. some things had happened recently that he wasn't too happy about, but he wasn't going to think about that now. no, that was for later. for now, he had to worry about his job. the contract elliot had given him to carry out was to get rid of some drunk gang leader. the guy seemed to frequent the club of daggers, so that was where lief had decided to hang out until the man made an appearance.

the ghost just settled himself down in the corner of the room, taking an entire booth to himself. he just sat down and propped his feet up on the table. he might as well be comfortable with this, right? it could be a few hours before the man he was looking for showed up. lief looked around the club, wondering what was going through everyone else's minds. sometimes he wished he could read minds like some other species. or that he was, well, alive. that would have been amazing, too.

lief yawned. he was getting bored just watching people. there was only so much dry sex you could watch in a day, ya'know? lief's eyes ended up resting on three girls all trying to make out with each other. he made an 'ick' sound and stuck his tongue out in disgust. i bet none of those girls are lesbians. probably not even bisexual! he thought. the ghost honestly hated some of the girls at clubs that made out just to get to sleep with guys. it was gross and, well, it kind of insulted him.

the male looked straight ahead again and noticed a male standing . . . way too close. the stranger sat down at the booth with him. lief raised an eyebrow and took his feet off the table, moving over slightly. did he know this kid? he looked like a kid, at least. was this someone he met in the past and forgot about? lief tried to find out where he knew this male from but couldn't think of anything. as far as he knew, this was a stranger.

but then the stranger opened his mouth. " mmm, hey father. " lief knew this guy had to be either nuts or was just lied to. he laughed lightly. " i think you've got something wrong, kid. i'm not a 'father' to anyone, " he explained, hoping the kid would go away. lief wanted to be alert when the man came in. then again . . . talking to someone would make it less obvious, he thought. lief just sighed.

- - - - - - - -

437 words
wearing this
for cambunny<3
i give up on templates ._.

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

TABLE MADE BY SOCKMONKEY OF CAUTION 2.0.

[atrb=border,0,true] Magnus honestly had no idea how this was going to turn out. He really was hoping it would go the way he had dreamed all these years in the past, but he had yet to realize, life rarely went the way you thought it will. Granted there are always exceptions, but there weren’t really any in this moment, not at first at least. The rest would be determined soon though. He just had to wait and with that, he is the worst at. He simply sat there, staring at the male, hearing the words, just laughing coldly then for a moment. "i think you've got something wrong, kid. i'm not a 'father' to anyone," He simply studied the male for a moment, just murmuring, ”Go figure you don’t.” he said, his eyes now forming into a glare, not wavering from Lief’s as he simply pulled out a few documents out of his coat, a birth certificate and then simply said, ”So you’ve never ever dated and married arya cierra harcourt? Hmm? You never once had sex with her either. And you never had a child 579 years ago. Bull shit.” ”Better start talking, pops. By the way, it’s such a pleasure to meet you. I’m Magnus. I’m your son who became a bastard, literally because of you,” He muttered, not exactly hiding his bitterness. He was beyond relaxation and comfort, the fact that his father had not been around bringing him quite a bit of pain inside, something he did not care to admit, but he could not really hide how obvious it was based on the outward bitterness and resentment. [/style][style=width: 450px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; text-align: center; color: #000000; line-height: 80%; float: right; position: relative; top: -40px; left: -58px; margin-bottom: -100px;]for my dearest cuppy <3.

[LIEF LEON SNOW]

lief raised an eyebrow when the other took some papers out and set them on the table. he leaned over and pulled them closer to himself, looking at them. they weren't even originals; they were copies of a much, much older document . . . hearing what the other said, lief tried to not let the surprise show on his face. how does he know about her? this . . . could he really be our . . . ? that's not possible, we only had sex once. she couldn't have . . . could she? he thought.

" your details are a little off, son. we were engaged, we never got married. our dads had me killed so that would never happen, " he corrected, rubbing his temples. how was it that he could still get a headache when he was a ghost? maybe it was like that phantom leg syndrome; he could feel things even though he really shouldn't be able to. it was so annoying. my body should realize it's dead already. it's been almost six hundred years, after all. he sighed.

he glared at the man, not really appreciating his attitude. " bastard. " the word rang in his ears, though not in magnus's voice. no, lief heard his father's voice, his mother's, the lords and ladies who came to their castle to eat . . . all of them calling him " the bastard. " he wasn't even a person, he was a bastard. he frowned. how dare this kid accuse lief of making him a bastard? he didn't even know he had a kid until now!

" you don't become a bastard, you're born one. and i guess it's only natural that a bastard would have a bastard, isn't it? and magnus, your mother should have taught you to respect your elders, especially your father, " he snarled. maybe it was just the mood he was in, but lief wasn't up for this kid's shit. okay, he had a son. the bigger deal was that his son seemed to be a complete douche. " so why talk to me now? i'm not marrying your mother, if that's what you're thinking. heh, never fucking another woman again, " he said, mumbling the last bit.

- - - - - - - -

377 words
wearing this
for cambunny<3
i give up on templates ._.

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

TABLE MADE BY SOCKMONKEY OF CAUTION 2.0.

[atrb=border,0,true] Magnus watched him slide the documents closer, seeing the shock. He tried to think it was some sort of lie, but that shock hit him somewhere deep down. Now he had known his father had never known about him before. Maybe this was all a mistake. He gazed down at his empty glass realizing this is all too well what he felt like. Why did this have to be so complicated? He simply watched him look over the documents, not having anything to say this time. Maybe he should just simply leave and never come back because perhaps this was a grave mistake for Lief to know now. For once, he realized what he should have done. " your details are a little off, son. we were engaged, we never got married. our dads had me killed so that would never happen." He simply listened, feeling like everything he had known was a lie now. He could feel the anger bubblig up in him not at his father but at his mother. She had never gave him the full story or even the true one. He was silent in his anger though, as if he was trapped while the inner him was twisting and turning while pounding his fists into everything. He heard him repeating the word, seeing the glare and simply stared at him as if he was unaffected, but there was something cutting into him deeper than either of them knew. He wanted approval deep down and maybe he was a big mess up in his life. In reality, how could magnus know really? He had nothing to go by all his life and honestly it was neither of their faults, life was just that cruel to both of them to have kept them separated like it had. ”you don’t become a bastard, you’re born one. And I guess it’s only natural that a bastard would have a bastard, isn’t it? and magnus, your mother should have taught you to respect your elders, especially your father.” He heard him and simply sat there, it only cutting deeper and he would not normally seem so broken about it, but this situation simply had him thrown for a loop, feeling horrid about how he had approached the male at all and now that he had not only treated his father like he had, but how his father was now treating him like this. ”that’s the problem, I never had you there. And well, my mother, she obviously hasn’t told me the truth. See family is not necessarily biological, it is also who you choose. I didn’t really have one, so I made up my own. You’re right though, why talk to you now. it was a mistake.” it was the closest thing to an apology that Lief would get and he simply stood up, tears building even more as he felt more hurt than he ever had in his life, just walking away from Lief, thinking about nights as a child where he cried because he had no father because he felt like he was alone. [/style][style=width: 450px; font-family: arial; font-size: 10px; text-align: center; color: #000000; line-height: 80%; float: right; position: relative; top: -40px; left: -58px; margin-bottom: -100px;]for my dearest cuppy <3.

[LIEF LEON SNOW]

lief noticed the distinct lack of emotion appearing on his son's - oh god, he'd have to get used to saying that - face. for a moment lief wondered if maybe magnus was just lying. after all, he wasn't really responding anymore. lief figured maybe the kid finally realized that it was pointless to try to trick the ghost. for as long as he lived, he -- wait a minute. the ghost blinked and looked down at his hands, thinking. he was . . . gosh, almost six hundred now. but he was only nineteen when he died. that meant magnus had to be . . . well, something that definitely wasn't human.

" okay, hang on, wait up. if you'd my son, how are you here? why are you not dead? i was . . . alive when we slept together. human. sierra . . . she was human, too, right? " he asked, a bit pathetically. as far as lief and his family had known, sierra's entire family had been ordinarily human. her humanity had been why lief had left after his sister died . . . he didn't want to scare her. he wanted sierra to live a long, full life with someone living, to be happy. why? because at that time, he loved her. she . . . maybe she became an immortal afterwards? made him sell his soul, too? became a vampire after we parted?

” that’s the problem, i never had you there. and well, my mother, she obviously hasn't told me the truth. see family is not necessarily biological, it is also who you choose. i didn't really have one, so i made up my own. you’re right though, why talk to you now. it was a mistake. ” and then magnus started to get up. lief blinked a bit in confusion and stood up, grabbing onto the hybrid's arm. " don't blame your mother! i'm sure she had her reasons. and it wasn't like i didn't want to be there . . . i died. isn't that a good enough excuse? " he said, for some reason not wanting magnus to go. everyone was just popping into his life nowadays, one after the other . . .

if he's here, she must be somewhere close. the thought made his non - beating heart flutter. lief looked up at magnus, opening his mouth to speak, but quickly shut it. he could see tears building up in magnus's eyes. the ghost frowned and hesitantly wrapped his arms around magnus in a hug. he hoped to god that the other wouldn't push him away; that would be embarrassing. " should we go somewhere a bit more private? " he asked softly. lief knew how it would sound to others that walked by, but he couldn't care less about those people. this was between a man - was he even a man? - and his son.

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screw word counts
wearing this
for cambunny<3
loooool

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

magnus had no intention of staying around long enough for lief to be able to call him his son, not wanting him to even refer to him as that, not even one bit. Everything about this meeting was only putting him through more hurt and he wanted no more of this, no more of anything involving his parents. Part of him wanted that, but that part was quite distant from the surface. He breathed in deeply, blocking the rage of emotions from slipping to the surface, having managed to control his appearance for many years. He simply had just learned to because of his mother.

Magnus looked at him as the words came out and he wanted to tell him to shut up and never respond to him ever again, but he simply went civil. “I’m part fallen. She was an angel,” he said softly as he looked into his eyes, wondering what exactly about this was so shocking, but then again, he knew that lief probably had thought she was completely human and for all that magnus knew, maybe she had been at one point in time, but obviously it had changed or something. There was no way around it because magnus had been a product of them both and there was no way he became fallen randomly.

magnus felt his arm grasped onto, forced to stop really although he could hurt lief if he wanted to in that moment. “it is what it is. Things are done. It’s also why I shouldn’t have come. I should have left things be. I’m the wrong one. Always have been. Then again I’m just a stupid kid right..your stupid kid,” he muttered as he felt a few tears fall then, not wanting to refer to him as his father but he was and there was no avoiding that now so he simply grew silent. He then felt the last thing he expected from lief, a hug. It had begun, what he feared most in this moment. “no, I can’t do this right now. I know it’s not your fault okay? But I can’t be around you. I just can’t. Please let go,” he said as more tears fell, it hurting him too much. He could feel others watching which was not helping one bit.

[LIEF LEON SNOW]

lief listened to magnus, shocked. magnus was . . . half fallen angel? sierra had been an angel? lief tried to think back to see if he could remember seeing the scars on her back that marked her as a fallen. magnus said she had been an angel. that meant she would have had the scars, right? that would have marked her as a fallen. as hard as he tried, though, he couldn't remember seeing her back at all. maybe that was why. she might have known he would ask questions and wouldn't want to answer them. lief just looked at magnus, in shock. " so you . . . and she . . . why didn't she tell me? and all that time, i could have . . . i could have gone to see her. shown her i was still alive. well, that i was still here. i could have helped her raise you, " he said quietly, under his breath.

hearing magnus talk more, seeing the tears, lief felt a small pull at his heart. one part of him was screaming for him to stop this; so what if he had a kid? a kid was a liability. the kid would get found out sooner or later, and what should he care? but since running into landon again, of falling in love with him all over again, lief felt different. changed. he actually cared now, even about magnus. he couldn't help but want to hug magnus, his son, who was now crying. " don't talk like that . . . sure, you may be a stupid kid, but i can't really say that now and . . . hell, you may be a genius for all i know. but i wanna know. " he said, hoping he sounded genuine. the last thing he wanted was for magnus to think he was joking.

the ghost frowned at what magnus said. he pulled out of the hug and huffed. without a word, lief grabbed magnus' hand and pulled him into the unisex bathroom, locking the door behind them; for a moment he thought of how pissed the boss would be after he failed this mission, but then he realized he didn't care anymore. he crossed his arms and looked at this crying son. " you're not leaving until we talk, magnus. i'm not about to let you go ' hi, dad, it's me! ' and then run off crying. we're talking. " lief walked over to him and held one of magnus' hands in both of his own. " what all . . . did she tell you, about me? "

- - - - - - - -

screw word counts
wearing this
for cambunny<3
loooool

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

Magnus had never thought about scars, nor really stared at his mother or watched her enough to see the scars that she would automatically have from being a fallen angels. He sort of was curious what it was like to get your wings ripped off, but he was positive he never wanted to find out. Somehow, falling from perfection seemed painful, but that was just his instincts talking to him about such things. “She didn’t think you were alive, Lief. I wish she had known you were alive because we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now and things wouldn’t be so complicated,” he said, his heart thudding beneath his chest from all the frustration he was feeling at the moment. Everything seemed like they might explode, that his heart would leap out of his chest, or he would just go crazy.

Magnus listened to him and rolled his eyes, hating that he was arguing with him and maybe he could see his mother’s point about how they both were sort of stubborn in a way. He wondered if he could come to see eye to eye with his father. They both were upset at the moment. He blinked as he was pulled into the unisex bathroom watching him lock the door and just blinked, a few more tears falling. He wasn’t sure about all the handholding that was going on, but he could get used to it. He gently squeezed his hand and said, “That you were my father, that you died, and just that basically even if you were here, you couldn’t have handled a baby.” He shrugged and knew that wasn’t everything or exactly what she had said, but he wasn’t completely lying.

“You know this probably looks horrible to the people out there? They probably think we’re having sex or something. We should just sit and talk out there or outside maybe,” he said soflty.

[LIEF LEON SNOW]

lief listened to magnus and shook his head; he just didn't understand, did he? " i'm not alive, that's the thing. i haven't been alive since . . . since i was nineteen. this? the way i am? it isn't alive. i wish i was alive. i just . . . exist. that's all. i'm just an existing being that isn't really alive. ghosts aren't alive, " he said, trying to keep his voice calm. he could feel the familiar choke of wanting to cry, but as usual, nothing came out. he couldn't cry. he couldn't do anything. he was dead. he wasn't alive. crying was for the living., and if there was one thing lief knew for sure it was that he wasn't alive.

seeing the eye roll, lief really did have a flashback of himself as a teenager. when he had been alive, he'd acted a lot like magnus . . . in a way. growing up, lief was a bastard; he was lucky to be raised by his actual father in a house of nobles, being trained to be a knight. that being said, he was stubborn, just like magnus was. he had wanted to know who his real mother was about as much as magnus seemed to have wanted to know about the ghost. as he dragged the younger male into the bathroom, he didn't care how it looked to other people; they could make up something about how they were long - lost siblings. no one would ever believe lief was this kid's dad, after all.

the ghost nodded slightly. " that's all? okay . . . well, that all is true. i died while we were engaged, and i had loved her. a lot. and about not being able to handle a baby . . . was also true. after i died, i haunted my father. i wanted revenge, not a kid. plus, until my dad died, i hadn't been able to even leave the castle, and your mother . . . well, she never visited. and i kinda realized i liked guys a lot more than girls, and . . . yeah. " he rambled. lief felt like he had to explain himself to his kid, which he didn't really like, but magnus deserved an explanation. " but, 'm sorry i wasn't there to help raise you. to be honest, it was probably better that way, though. " after all, it wasn't like lief was a murderer or anything.

he shrugged. " you okay to head back out? i figured it'd be easier - and safer - to talk in here. plus, we can say we're long lost siblings or some shit. or that it isn't their business. " lief smiled just a bit and hugged magnus loosely. there was no reason behind it, really, other than he had the urge to . . . because this was his son, of his own flesh - the flesh he didn't have anymore.

- - - - - - - -

screw word counts
wearing this
for cambunny<3
loooool

[MAGNUS RENLY HARCOURT]

Magnus listened to him talk about how he wasn’t alive, which he knew, but what was he really? He was in some in between state that Magnus couldn’t find words for exactly. He would hate to be a ghost though, figuring it must be hard at times. He wondered if they even could stay in this form all the time or not. All he knew was that he couldn’t handle being stuck like that, possibly not being able to contact anyone in a while and not know what would be the trigger to you moving on. He wasn’t sure if he could live in that kind of torture, but again, like his father had said, he was dead.

Magnus had not drawn connection to being so much like his father, not wanting to believe he was anything like him, not even now upon knowing that he wasn’t what he originally thought. When he was dragged into the bathroom, he blinked at the ghost’s strength, people watching and he just sighed softly, beginning to listen to his explanation. He blinked at the liking of guys, instantly feeling a little vulnerable, but he just asked, “What? You like guys?” He had a one track mind and right in that moment, that’s all was attracting his attention. Then the apology came, but then it was like it all didn’t matter. “Sure,” he said and felt worthless for a moment. He didn’t need any more explanations. “Can I go now?” he asked, feeling some need to get approval from his father.

Magnus shrugged, “Yeah. I don’t really care anymore, Lief.” He felt like he got what he needed and that it didn’t matter. Even though Lief had pulled him aside to explain, there was this gap still in him that told him it didn’t really matter. “I shouldn’t have been so mean about stuff, so I’m sorry, but truth is, I probably shouldn’t have come. You said it yourself, it was probably better that you weren’t there,” he said, tears beginning to build again.