IN THE HEART OF THE NIGHT || CASRA

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] He was dead. That was the very first thought that flickered through Cas' mind mainly because it seemed like the only possible outcome after what had just happened. But the clearer his mind grew that idea was starting to grow less plausible because he was in too much damn pain to be dead. Or at least he would have hoped you couldn't feel this bad after you moved on to wherever it was you went after you died. Beneath him was cold, hard cement, the grit digging into his palms as he shifted slightly, a bad idea it turned out as even worse pain shot through his entire body. Before this moment Cason had never thought it was possible for every inch of your body to hurt. The saying 'I feel like I've been run over by a semi' really did seem quite accurate just then. For a few moments he just laid there face down on the ground, catching his breath and figuring out his next move. It probably hadn't been the smartest idea he'd ever had nor the best planned but he'd been pissed, beyond pissed really, more like furious. It was his smart ass buddy Damon who had clued him into things in the first place, a completely unintentional action he was sure considering the guy had been absolutely wasted at the time. Mentioned this guy, Gabe Kallis, someone he'd met out and about at one of probably numerous bars he'd visited that night and somehow both had managed to run into Cierra. Damon being his normal self had admitted to hitting on her (which to Cas' great satisfaction she'd turned down) and if that had been the end of things he likely would have let things go after making sure it wouldn't happen again. This Gabe character clearly had other intentions and according to Damon had not only threatend Cierra's life but apparently gotten rough with her as well. As a general rule Cas had a good handle on his temper, knew when he was getting too hot and needed to simmer down and what not. When it came to certain things (and people) though once it was lit there was no defusing it and when he got angry it was akin to a volcano going off to put it mildly. When it came to Cierra the hunter had this almost ridiculously protective streak and honestly he couldn't even tell you why. It was just there, had been almost from their first meeting on. Maybe it was because she was so timid and vulnerable seeming that he felt like he needed to watch out for her like he did. Of course there was also the fact that he was pretty much head over heels in love for the girl too, though that fact he wasn't about to admit to anyone, himself included. It wasn't as if anything was going to happen between them or at least he didn't have any reason to think she wanted to be more than friends, though there had been a few times that he thought he might have seen something in her eyes...No, no, he'd quickly stuffed that back inside the mess of a head of his. Still all of those feelings aside and he still would have reacted exactly the same as he had. As far as he was concerned anyone who dared to lay a hand on Cierra was as good as dead. And this guy doubly so if only because from Damon's (albeit drunken) description of the guy had Cas guessing he was no human. The next couple of days after that unexpected conversation with Damon, the hunter had done what he did best and done some digging on Mr. Gabe Kallis. What he found out only served to confirm those suspicions. Man was a damn vampire. And a powerful one from the sounds of it too. Now any hunter with half a head knew it was just plain stupid to confront a vampire head on in a group, let alone by yourself and Cas knew that as well as anyone of his peers. Furious as he was though Cas didn't give a shit. He wanted the bastard dead or at the very least wishing he was. It had been fairly easy to track the vamp as he didn't seem all too worried about covering his tracks. Trailing him for most of the evening as he flitted from bar to bar, flirting and seducing women in an all too easy manner it was well past one in the morning before Gabe was finally ready to call it a night. And by that actually leave with a girl (or likely victim). The pair had made their way to the back exit leading out into a dark alley and god only knew where the vampire planned on taking her from there. Whatever plan he'd had in mind was obviously thwarted by Cason's unexpected arrival in the form of a sudden figure lunging towards him with a razor sharp wooden stake. It wasn't exactly the most well thought out plan but even so Cas had the element of surprise on his side. What he hadn't factored in, however, was the girl with the vampire and as soon as he'd spotted the hunter Gabe had pulled the girl in front of him, causing Cason to shift at the last second and instead of putting the stake through his heart left him simply grazing the creature's shoulder. It was still wood though and still hurt Gabe enough to throw his balance off, allowing the girl time to run after having been thoroughly freaked out by the sudden attack. If things had gone like he'd hoped the vampire would have been lying there dead, that had been Cas' hopes, one try don't mess up sort of deal. Unfortunately now though he was left facing a very annoyed and obviously sadistic vamp who was still very much alive. Cas had come prepared though and reached to pull out another stake but as expected Gabe didn't even give him that much time. The next ten minutes consisted of Cason receiving the worst beating he'd ever experienced in his entire life. Slammed against the building wall, against the ground, into the side of metal garbage bins, punched, kicked and thrown until everything was just a blur. The second stake had long ago been thrown from his grasp but after yet another jarring hit against the pavement he caught sight of the weapon beside him and slide it quickly beneath him. A second later he felt the vampire's hand grasping the back of his shirt, pulling him upright and yanking him around. It was exactly what Cas needed him to do and before Gabe even knew what the hunter was doing he'd shoved the stake through the vampire's middle. Not a death strike but it was by far worse than a simple graze to the shoulder and it had Gabe stumbling back, letting go of Cas in the process, hissing obscenities at him before turning and staggering down the alley. Without the support of the vamp's arm holding him upright, Cas sank to his knees, his head reeling before slumping unconscious to the ground. Though it probably hadn't been all that long it felt like an eternity had passed when he had finally come to again and remained there now, wondering just how long it was going to take him to get back to his truck. As out of it as he still was there was an undeniable urgency nagging at his mind still. He had to get to her. Just in case Gabe decided to pay her a visit. Unlikely considering his condition but even the slightest possibility was terrifying. Mostly recovered from the last failed attempt to move, he tried again, this time moving excruciatingly slow. Even so he was biting back any sounds of pain and seeing stars by the time he got to his knees. "Just get on your feet, Cas, you've got this..." he muttered to himself and using the brick wall beside him for support finally got to his feet, albeit wobbly but upright. Thank god he'd had the foresight to park his truck just outside the alley, having expected the vampire to chose and exit that led to a less populated area. With help from the wall and the remaining adrenaline still pumping through his system he managed to make it back to his truck, yanking the door open and leaning heavily on it for a moment, wincing as he blinked back another round of dizziness. When it passed he managed to haul himself onto the seat, the door slamming shut after him as he just sat there for a moment, eyes closed. He'd already started guessing just how badly he was hurt while on the way to the truck though it was hard to pinpoint every single thing when your entire being felt like it was made of pain. It hadn't taken long to discover his right shoulder was dislocated though, now hugged tightly against his torso and the stabbing pain in his left side with each breath suggested at least a few broken ribs. If anything else was broken he couldn't tell, not yet anyway. Opening his eyes then he happened to glance in the rear view mirror, noting with chagrin the bruised and bloodied face staring back at him. One eye was swollen half shut and a large gash above his left eyebrow had blood trickling down the side of his face. Not to mention the other numerous little cuts and bruises. No doubt the rest of him looked just like that too. Digging the keys gingerly from his pocket Cas started the engine and slipped it into gear. "Alright man, no passing out now..." he murmured out loud before heading down the street. The clock showed almost three in the morning but the time was the last thing on his mind just then. He honestly wasn't even sure just how he got to Cierra's apartment building, going on autopilot it seemed which made the late hour and empty streets a good think likely. Though the building's lack of security usually annoyed him, Cason was actually glad for it this one time if only because it made it that much easier for him. Mentally cursing the fact that her apartment was on the second floor (and that there was no elevator) he used just about every supportive surface he could find to make it to the staircase and pausing for a second to catch his breath he started up them. If it hadn't been for the railing he was pretty sure he would have been dragging himself up the steps. As it was he really hoped the banister wasn't as frail as it looked seeing as it was supporting most of his weight just then. It wasn't really that long of a staircase but he felt like he'd just climbed Mt. Everest by the time he reached the top. With his goal in sight though he didn't pause, making his way slowly and painfully down the narrow hallway that led to her apartment door. Once there he raised his good arm to knock, his hand shaking even as he hit it a couple of times with his fist, a normally loud action but coming out not much louder than your normal knock would. "Please wake up, baby..." he breathed with a grimace, staggering back to lean against the wall for support. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

Cierra was not yet asleep. Almost, but not quite. The now twenty-six year old had trouble sleeping. It had only been a recent issue. The shapeshifter couldn’t for the life of her get her mind to relax. It was constantly racing over everything that was happening. She wasn’t even sure how all of this came on her life. It seemed that only a couple of months ago, she was quietly working at a coffeeshop with the only problem of having a family nagging at her. She had a best friend in which nothing was complicated and everything was light, fluffy, and fun. Someone who completely seemed to understand Cierra’s point of view. Cierra had also kept to herself, only lightly smiling at strangers when they first smiled at her or ducked her head to avoid eye contact. Just blend within the shadows except for a couple of important people in her life. That had all changed in the last couple of months.

Now it seemed that the friends she was slowly starting to collect just vanished out of thin air. The best friend who she thought she was always able to count on was now pregnant after a one night stand. Cierra couldn’t really blame her for that, since she had been drugged up, but now everything was going to change. Cierra wasn’t sure if Vi was going to have time for her friend anymore when she had a kid around! What if the kid hated Cierra? Cierra was generally good with her nieces and nephews, but she wasn’t sure how this baby would take her. It disturbed her more that the father was a piece of something else. She wanted to help Vi, but she had no idea how to do it. Then there was her own personal issues… lately she had been somewhat of a target for others. The other day there was one that terrified her. As in she didn’t think she was going to make it out of there.

It had been even during the day time. Two guys who looked as if they had drank a little bit much marched up to her. The tall blonde gave a smile and complimented her with wiggling eyebrows and all. At first, she just repeated a thank you, but when he made it very clearly that he had other intentions, she turned him down. That’s when the dark haired one came at her and started to talk. He was talking that since one couldn’t have her, the other should get the try. After his talk over and over about lunch, she started guessing and more than once, his smile had two extra teeth in it. Cierra had been facing a vampire and had been tossed around a little bit. Quite literally, he jerked her about to watch her spin and look terrified. The other one left, looking very creeped out about the delight of tossing a woman around did. Cierra thought for then she was done for, but he looked over his shoulder and got distracted by something else. She barely got out of there. Riley had been right. Cas couldn’t be there all the time.

Oh Cas. The giant part of it all. Cierra wrote, said, thought repeatedly the exact lines of Vi. ”Don’t fall for him. He’ll hurt you.” At the time, she had turned her head at her friend, trying to wonder where in the world that came from. One night at the guy’s house and Vi was warning her about something like that? At the time, Cierra also figured he would never be seeing him again so she reassured her friend that she had nothing to worry about. Now everything was so turned around. Cierra was indeed starting to really like Cas. Really like him. As in no past crush could have compared to anything like that. He was a hunter and it was probably one of the most dangerous men she could date. She had seen at the very first moment him put a bullet through a warlock without a second thought to it. Yet, that wasn’t him. She saw so much more of him. From the day at the golf course and then on. When he showed the kind of friendship he did with her dog form, she about melted on the spot. She sent him flowers to the coffeeshop on her birthday when she wasn’t even aware he knew the date. Just thinking about him made her heart race.

But she had to be realistic to herself. Cason needed someone stronger than her. Someone who didn’t break easily like a leaf (and probably someone who was human). She had been spending her nights watching movies made for hopeless romantics like her so that she would feel a little better about it all. The flowers were sitting on her counter by her TV, so she glanced at them every once in a while. Cierra was just going to have to deal with it, but the problem was the girl was too emotional. Even now as she was watching Notting Hill, trying to get her mind off of things. She could only handle so much before she exploded. She exploded on some poor guy at the pub the other night. More so than she had before. Anymore and it was likely she was going to explode or something. Watching the screen, she sat on her bed and hugged her pillow in giggling slightly at the ending. Once the rolling credits came, she looked at her time and realized it was getting pretty late. Time to try to get some sleep.

She clicked it off and rubbed her eyes a bit, feeling tired all around. Cierra had already gotten ready for bed in her lavender cloth pajamas. All she had to do was slip under the covers and let the attempting to start. What she had realized she needed to focus on was just trying to let everything escape her mind. Just leave and head off somewhere else. Her body formed into that little ball it usually did, tucking her nose under the sheets. Cierra tried to think of nature, as that always was simple to her. The clouds, the trees, the woods all around her. It eased her mind if she just thought it, pictured it in her mind. It was right about then she heard something. Light but her dog ears and smallness of the apartment (sound didn’t have far to travel) made her open her eyes. Her upper body perked up, staring at the door and taking a deep breath in to see if she could smell it from here. The only scent she picked up was… blood.

Very carefully, she eased to the door, reaching on her tip toes to peek through a peep hole and with what she saw she felt like she about died. She unlocked the door and swung it open as hard as she could to see if the peep hole may have been making it worse than it was, but no, it was exactly how it looked. Her head thudded hard as she saw a very beat up Cas who looked as if he was going to collapse on the spot. Goodness, he was so beat up, blood covering his face! Cierra was internally freaking out, not being able to say anything but ”Cas!” She almost felt like running around because she didn’t know what to do. How did he end up like this? What happened to him? Concern flooded through her mind, screaming almost in her head. Her hand reached out and tucked under him just so she was able to lead him in and sat him down on the bed. Almost at once, she ran to her cubboard (thankful for once her place was small enough for all of this) and grabbed the softest towel she had, running and giving it to him. With almost a panicked motion, she grabbed his hand gently asking, ”Tell me what to do, what do I need?” She could ask what happened to him after she made sure that he wasn’t going to pass out on her. Or worst. Her heart thudded harder. Oh no, not worst! She didn’t know how bad it had to be. It looked like he had been beat pretty bad. The thought was killing her, and all she could do to help him was wait with eager big brown eyes for what she needed to do. She had to help him.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] Cas was absolutely one hundred percent certain he'd never been more happy to see a door fly open than in that exact moment. The worry that she wouldn't even hear him there at all was obviously a big part of it but overshadowing that even was the fear that the vampire had somehow got to her before he had. If he'd been less out of it and really stopped to think about it the probabilty of that happening was low all things considered but the haze that was his mind just then was still in near panic mode at the thought of Gabe getting to her. It was almost scary what he would be willing to do to protect this girl. Hell, he'd just gotten his ass handed to him and would still go back and do it all over again if he had to if that's what it took. If it had been anyone else doing it he would have considered them absolutely off their rocker. Nuts, just absolute nuts. A category he apparently fell under now considering he was the one beaten half to death due to picking a fist fight with a vampire. The look on her face was one of absolute horror and he could practically see her fighting to remain calm, even in the fogged up state he was in currently. Later on he was going to kick himself for doing this to her, showing up on her doorstep looking like death warmed over, but right at the moment he was in too much pain to give it more than a passing thought. The shortened version of his name fell from her tongue in a shocked tone and a moment later she was beside him, one arm reaching under him to offer much needed support. The girl was clearly much stronger than most people probably gave her credit for because Cas knew he was leaning quite heavily on her despite his best efforts not to. Thankfully there was now at least one reason to be grateful for her having such a small apartment as it meant a relatively short trip from the front door to the bed which she helped ease him carefully onto before running across the room. The effort of it all was enough to send another wave of dizziness over him and he swayed slightly, steadying himself with his good arm against the surface of the mattress. No passing out, not now. It was bad enough for her to have to see him like this let alone black out on her. Taking a few deep breaths (as deep as his cracked ribs would allow that is) he managed to stay upright until the feeling passed and then she was back, handing him a soft towel. Automatically he lifted the fabric to his face, holding it gingerly against the deep gash on his forehead, wincing despite his best efforts to keep a straight face. He hated her having to see him like this, hated seeing how much he was scaring her. As small as the gesture might have seemed to Cierra, the gentle grasp of her hand as she took a hold of his own was reassuring, letting him know he wasn't alone. Cas was not the sort of man who asked for help very often. He pretty much took care of himself whether it was getting out of a tough spot in a hunt or patching himself up after it was all said and done. This time though there was no way he was going to be able to sew himself up and be done with it. Even he could admit that much. Lowering the towel from his forehead, he found himself looking down into a pair of very wide, almost desperate brown eyes. Before this moment the hunter had yet to actually acknowledge to himself just how much he loved cared for Cierra. It easy to tell himself it was nothing out of the ordinary, that he would have done the exact same thing for Jude or even Sam. And he would have, those two were pretty much as close as it came to what amounted to family for him. There were other feelings that arose, however, when it came to the brunette sitting beside him. Like the fact that when she smiled at him he felt like his heart was going to pound out of his chest. Or that when she had been gone for the week visiting her family he'd done nothing but think about her and missed hearing her voice. That laugh, that contagious sound that just made him want to grin like an idiot. When he was with her he was happy. Truly, one hundred percent happy. And that didn't just happen with anyone for him. Not anymore at least. Her concern filled query brought him back to what was happening right then and an answer immediately entered his mind but he hesitated in saying it. Despite what people might have thought Cason knew she was a much stronger person than she was often given credit for, physically and mentally. Plenty of other people would have been in hysterics just then, running around the room without a clue as to what to do. She was scared, he could clearly see that much, but she wasn't letting it get the best of her either, which was exactly what he needed. "My...shoulder..." he started slowly, giving a very faint motion of his head towards his arm, still cradled against his chest. "...can you...help me...put it back...in place?" The words were punctuated with short pauses, his breath hitching slightly as his ribs once again reminded him they were not alright. It wasn't an overly difficult procedure but definitely not for the squeamish. Whether or not it was something that would bother her he wasn't sure but he wouldn't blame her if she couldn't. It was probably what hurt the worst right then though, his ribs coming in a close second after that. "If you can't...it's alright, I understand," he added softly, not wanting to make her feel forced to do something she couldn't handle. He was already asking more than enough of her just by showing up like this period. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

People often had told Cierra that she ought to be a vet or doctor the way she cared for people. There had always been two problems with that. One- biology class was a killer on her. Two- she couldn’t stand the sight of someone being hurt, even if she was meant to fix them. She could barely handle when a stranger was beat up and bruised, but to have Cason in this type of fix was really taking the toll on her as she sat next to him. Now that he sat down in her place having only the small light by the kitchen on, she only verified what type of condition he was in. She wished she could have taken some sort of class that instructed her what to do next. There were only a few things she was able to do when it came to something like a cut. This was way more than a cut. What was even worst was she didn’t know how bad the condition actually was. It looked awful, but perhaps it looked worse than it was. On the other hand, it could very well a worse condition that it looked. That was saying quite a bit. Since Cierra tended to be a worrier and paranoid, she was franticly thinking it was the second option.

Should she call someone? Knowing his job, she was sure that the last thing hunters wanted in the world was to get attention from the police. It brought up the subject of what happened. Cierra didn’t know and she probably wouldn’t be able to keep that question in for much longer, but she assumed it had to do with hunting. She wasn’t sure if the police would really side with his story. Cierra felt like she was going to explode all over again. Her worry for him was driving her insane while at some weird little part of herself, she found that she was always excited for Cason to come over. It would have been nice if it wouldn’t be in pieces like this. All the same. She wished she could smile and make the grateful smiles like she had done on his previous visits. This was a time where Cason could have used a very strong woman. She would have stormed through this apartment not even needing to ask. She probably would have just known and told him to lay down and she’d take care of it. Instead, he got her.

The question in her mind as to why he even came here in the first place also popped up for a couple of seconds. However, they were also answered just by rational reasoning. He couldn’t have made it far from here. Rather try to head all the way to his place or come over here. She must have been the closest base he could have taken. Yes, Cierra accepted that. Her mind wasn’t going to go too far into something like that. Cas was literally broken in front of her and the last thing she needed to do was pick apart things. As soon as he spoke, her entire body leaned forward, as if she was going to miss it if she didn’t. The way he talked made her want to hit herself for making him talk. It sounded horribly forced. Trouble breathing. She had no idea what or how that was, but she could conclude that she wanted to just magically fix it.

His request made her push back a little bit, wide eyed. Her eyes darted to his shoulder and didn’t even see it until now. The thought made her nervous. The girl wasn’t exactly the definition of brave. There had only been one other incident where she had to deal with something like this. It was when she was about fifteen and her brother had slammed into a tree from fighting a human. His shoulder was out of place and he was barking at everyone around him. Cierra’s sister knew how to fix it right back into place, but she had Cierra help her since Tiara’s mind had been a little fuzzy. That was the only experience Cierra had on putting shoulders back in place. One thing she was certain of was that it didn’t really depend on the strength of the person, but how it was done. A score with her part. After this, she hoped that he would look over the fact that her strength was increased by not only a shapeshifter ability, but serious adrenaline running through her. After this, she was probably going to crash.

He continued when she didn’t answer right away and her heart thudded hard into her chest as she looked at him once again. It was such a soft tone. No, Cierra needed to help him. It didn’t matter what she was confused about what they were right now. Right now, she just needed make sure Cas was okay. But it had been so long ago! It wasn’t as if she was supposed to tell Cason to hang on a moment while she quickly googled it and hoped that it wasn’t something fake and go for it. Any stupid move on here and he could be worse than he already was. The thought of it made her cringe. Cierra still felt like running around not knowing what to do. She was freaking out to say the least. Her stance stood up as she said almost in a timid voice, ”No, I… I can do that.” Another memory popped into her head as she remembered Tiara fixing up her brother. Her brother jolted and screamed loudly in pain once it was placed back. Oh no.

Trying to recall what she did in the past was harder than she had even imagined. She didn’t want this messing up even more. She did remember that it seemed like such an easy movement but her brother had been squirming. Cas in pain was going to put her in tears, she was sure of it. Clenching her jaw, she forced her hand to let go of his and placed on the back of his shoulder blade. Her other hand grasped his wrist and put it at a 90 degree angle. That’s what Tiara had said, right? No movement had really been used and she couldn’t help but remember when Cason was standing in front of frightened Cierra with a cotton ball telling her that her head needed to have a fix. The way he gently asked if she was ready. ”Are you ready?” She echoed the words to him, softly and barely above a whisper, slightly hovering over him and forgetting for two seconds how serious of a situation this was by looking at him. All she could think of was to stay with her. Stay awake and hope she didn’t cause too much for him.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] This was not at all how Cas wanted his next visit to Cierra's apartment to be like. In fact, this was probably the worst possible way he could have imagined it going. He was a hunter and like every person who touted that as their 'profession' he also knew the risks that came with it. Each hunt meant a chance you might not come back. It was why most of them had very few if any real relationships, friends or otherwise. It was just too risky and left you with too much to lose. Not to mention trying to explain to someone who was oblivious to what was out there in the world just what exactly it was you did. Cover stories and lies could only get you so far before you slipped up, got caught and either had to explain or else. It just wasn't a life suited to sharing with other people, for letting anyone in to get close. In the end someone always got hurt, usually them, and it wasn't always just emotionally either. People joked about bringing their work home with them and in this case that sometimes happened, quite literally. You didn't just kill a few supernaturals without earning a target on your back from the rest of them. Especially the bigger families, clans that had been around for a long time and went way back, generations of them all being taught to hate humans and kill hunters. Cason knew this as well as any hunter and quite honestly expected it to catch up with him someday. Dying from old age wasn't likely going to be his cause of death you could say. And he had already accepted that fact, a long time ago actually, and was alright with that. Or had been, up until lately that is. For the first time since Natalie had died Cas suddenly found himself wanting to get up in the morning and not just to go out and hunt whatever creature was out there but because he might end up getting to see her. She had quickly become the brightest spot in his life. That person who could put a smile on your face without you even realizing it just be thinking of them. Suddenly there was more than just getting revenge to look forward to and well, it was nice. Amazing actually. And also terrifying as hell. Because up until he'd been living this life, the life of a hunter, with absolutely nothing to lose. True there was Sam and there was Jude but when it came down to the nitty gritty of it they were in the same boat as he was, hunters who knew what they were getting themselves into. But Cierra, she hadn't signed up for this, hadn't asked to be pulled into this always watching your back lifestyle. And she definitely hadn't signed up to be the person whose house he showed up at looking half dead at three in the morning. Yeah, he would say it was because he wanted to make sure she was alright, that the vamp hadn't decided to take out his anger at Cas by harming her and that was mostly true but once he saw all was calm he could have left, gone to Sam's to get patched up. But he hadn't. Instead he'd knocked on that door and prayed she'd answer it. Because when it came right down to it she was the first and only person that had come to his mind when he knew he needed help. And dear lord did he need it. He didn't think there was one inch on his body that didn't hurt and any sort of movement or attempt at speaking just seemed to make it worse. It was more than obvious that the poor girl was more than a little overwhelmed by everything, her eyes darting back and forth nervously before she had focused them squarely on him, asking for direction. In that moment Cason knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he loved this woman. She was probably half panicking, caught completely off guard and given no explantion as to why he was in the condition he was in and yet all she asked was what she needed to do to help him. If he could have moved without sending a crazy amount of pain through his body he probably would have leaned over and straight up kissed her. As it was though all he could manage to do was convey at least a hint of those feelings as he met her gaze before asking that fairly loaded question. It was asking a lot and he knew it. The look on her face told him she hadn't been expecting that as her eyes flitted quickly towards his arm before back at his face, apprehension written all over her expression. Another pang of guilt flickered through him and along with it came the following reassurance that he wasn't going to be mad if she couldn't. Just the thought that she might be afraid he'd get mad at her made him want to flinch. He shouldn't have come, it was just so completely unfair to ask this of her... Before he could berate himself any further that oh so soft voice broke into his thoughts, timid but steady as she slowly stood up from the bed. There was really no way for him to even begin to describe the absolute relief that flowed through him at her words. It had occured to him that she might not even know the first thing about putting a dislocated shoulder back in place, it wasn't like it was a common happening for most people after all. However, that idea was soon put to rest as she carefully positioned his arm in the proper manner, hesitating slightly to look down into his eyes. Are you ready? Those three words were barely above a whisper but they caught his attention and he held her gaze for that brief moment, complete and utter trust in his green eyes as he nodded faintly. "You've got this, Sweetheart," He breathed out reassuringly and the endearment slipped off his tongue like he said it all the time (which he actually did in his head). Though he might have kicked himself for it any other time right then his attention was on bracing himself for the pain he knew would soon be coming. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

More worried thoughts entered her mind. She was sure that worry and her overall state of freaking out was probably written all over her face. Most people were able to put some sort of wall around themselves to protect from the situations. Not Cierra. She was probably one of the biggest open book person that anyone could meet. Anyone could really tell her mood if they tried hard enough. Even though Cierra fought to try to have a strong face for Cas, she knew it probably didn’t look like it. The more she worried, the more she was less focused on what her facial expression was. It was probably more of a decent thing to actually be focused on him. Being focused on the hunter wasn’t a difficult task. She would know. She had only been doing it for the past few months or so. Yet, here it was so different. The fact she cared about him worried her even more. Oh, she was going to screw this up! She just knew it! It was going to be all her fault! Example three on why she never could be a doctor.

She tried to think of a doctor she knew that could perhaps come and help at the last minute, but no names came up. The closest she had would be Vi but Cierra figured that girl had enough on her mind. Cierra was just so afraid of messing up at whatever it was to help him that she was searching other options in her head. All of the options rather weren’t available or too public for what he probably wanted. She couldn’t imagine some of the things rolling through his own head right then. Normally she thought he probably would have been noting how useless she was in this situation, but this was also a man she looked too highly on to say something like that about her. Or at least, she hoped he wouldn’t say that about her. About someone else, perhaps. She had heard him with particular people. Even though he would never think of Cierra like that, she still wanted to think he would at the least not think like that. Who knew? It wasn’t wise of her to stay on this subject. It just made her more anxious than the nervous, shaky shapeshifter already was.

Was she shaky? She looked down at her own hands and found that they were a bit vibrant. What she didn’t know was that her hands were perfectly stable, but her eyes were the things shaking so much. Just darting around from point to point was making her eyes very active. The brightness of her eyes had finally faded away, but they weren’t quite all the way back to brown yet. Just a hint of green that couldn’t be captured by this light. Cierra thought to turn on a light brighter than the one she turned on before getting the door. However, seeing Cas in a better light wasn’t going to improve anything. Not in her mind. Not for what she was trying to do. Okay, now that his arm was in the proper place, what was she supposed to do? Her brain scrambled for what happened next, feeling the pressure beating hard on her head as her panic came that she may not be able to do this. Her mind clicked when he started speaking again in that same soft hurting tone that made her knees weak. The nickname caught Cierra by surprise even though it had been said to her in dog form. Yet, this wasn’t being said to a lonely husky dog. This was being said to her. Cierra. He just called her sweetheart and she about forgot everything.

Focus. Focus. Focus. It was just a word. She could obsess over the very simple gesture later. Where was she? Cierra looked at the strong arm in her hands, feeling the hardness of the muscle under her fingertips. Very slowly and easily, not looking at Cas’ face, she kept the 90 degree angle and moved his arm to his chest. Once it reached his chest with the same pace, she slowly backed his arm out to the other side to as far as the arm could go. This was repeated. Chest to far chest to far. Cierra tried to remember how many times it was done with her brother. Her brother’s injury hadn’t really been exactly hard, only being injured by a tree. This arm went through who knows what force. After about the third time though it seemed to be getting easier, she was afraid she wasn’t doing it right. Embarrassment crossed her expression when she thought of not doing it right. Right at that moment, a large popping noise occurred in the shoulder to indicate that it had been popped back into place by the very easy exercise. Cierra released the arm and stared at the shoulder. Did she break it? Oh goodness, she broke it!

But looking at it a second time leaning a little closer, she saw that it didn’t look disfigured like it was before. Bloody and battered but so was the rest of him. Staring at it too long was making her a little dizzy and she focused on Cas’ face. Most specifically, the color of his eyes. One was harder to see because his eye was starting to swell but the color was still as beautiful as she remembered it. ”I think I got it… but d-don’t move…” She added, afraid that if he did, it’d somehow just snap right back out. Though she knew he was going to have to move it sometime. She bit the inside of her cheek, trying to figure out what she needed to do next. If anything. Before that came, however, she felt the words slipping out of her mouth before she grasped a chance to what she was saying, ”Cas, what happened to you?” Her voice ended up being a little like a worried plea and she stood straight up again out of her own nervousness. People used the same tone of voice when they were saying ‘don’t quit out on me’ so it was strange, she was sure. Perhaps she was also thinking that while she was asking her question. For all she knew, he could pass out at any moment. Her eyes glanced to the kitchen about ten feet away for the use of knowing where the water was. Was it time to ignore the question and go over to the first aid kit like she hadn’t said a word? She wasn’t sure what to do. Her foot stepped to the side as if it was weighing the option to just bolt on the words or not. The other foot seemed to be planted and waiting for an answer.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] She was right, the worry and panic was right there plain as day, though she was doing a better job of keeping her features calm than she likely feared. It was her eyes though, those big brown eyes that you could read like a book if you stopped long enough to take a good look into them. It was something Cas had picked up on not long after that first unexpected meeting at the bar, first when they were in his truck and again when he'd been cleaning the gash on her forehead. They'd been filled with fear and panic, a lot like now, and seeing it and knowing he was once again the cause of it pained him quite a bit. The urge to just sit her down beside him on the bed, pull her into his arms and tell her things were going to be alright gnawed at him then but he resisted it if only because the movement would have ridiculously painful and seeing that would make her feel worse than she did now most likely. She was much stronger than she gave herself credit for and he knew she could handle it even if it was tearing him up to put her through this. Every instinct he had was to shield her from this side of things, of his life, and the often brutal reality of it. Yet even so he couldn't help but be glad she was with him. Being near her was comforting, safe. If Cierra were to realize just how much that meant to him, or rather, how very rare that feeling was for him to have around people period, well she'd probably freak out. Or be taken aback at the very least. I mean, as far as he knew she didn't think of him as anything more than a good friend (or at least he hoped she counted him as such). She probably wasn't even sure why he'd chosen to show up like this in the first place. It wasn't like there was a logical reason for the choice, like that she was someone in the medical profession or had any particular set of skills when it came to emergency situations. If anything she had seemed to /not/ be very keen on blood or having to get too up close and personal with it, at least judging from the memory of their first encounter. She'd taken care of the gash on his forehead anyway though and more than that had been oh so gentle while doing it. Deep down Cas knew that even if he hadn't been fearing for her safety he somehow would have still found his way to her. Because quite simply he needed her beside him right now. Not anyone else, her. Period. He just hoped she'd forgive him for putting her through this, for being the one who had to fix him. He was a mess and he knew it. It wasn't something you really ever wanted to have to ask anyone to do and especially not someone who you knew wouldn't tell you no even if they wanted to. That was just who she was and he knew that but he also didn't want her to think he would ever take advantage of that fact either. The girl meant far too much to him for Cas to ever want her to feel even in the slightest that he was just using her for his own personal reaons. Walking all over her because he could, because she made it easy to do simply because she was a genuinely sweet person. There were plenty of people who did that as it was, that much he already knew. He might not have been planning to slip that simple word of endearment into his sentence but he didn't regret that it had been said. He probably would have been surprised and secretly happy if he knew how much that meant to her but at that moment he simply wanted her to know he trusted her with this. This being the seemingly simple yet complex task of getting his shoulder back into place. This wasn't the first time he'd had a shoulder dislocated but that time he'd been with Sam and unsurprisingly the guy had not been half as gentle as Cierra was being. He'd simply forced the join back into place with his hands, which had certainly fixed the problem but hurt like hell. She, on the other hand, was taking the more proper approach, moving his arm toward his chest and back out. Cas could feel the movement working as she repeated the action two more times and braced himself right before it suddenly slipped back into place with a loud popping sound. Flinching, he tried not to make too much noise for her sake, gritting his teeth to muffle the groan of pain in his throat. The immediate relief afterward though was more than worth it though and he let out the breath he'd been holding for the last few seconds. "Thanks, you did good..." he returned softly, meeting her worried gaze, finding it the slightest bit blurry due to the aforementioned swelling of the one. Blurry or not though she was still the most beautiful sight in the world right then. Gingerly he tested out the shoulder, finding it rather painful to move still but nothing like before. Her words made him pause and he bit his lip slightly, not at all sure how to answer that question. The tone of her voice, that worried plea, reminded him just how bad he must have looked and no doubt had her racking her brain to figure out what could have happened to cause it. He didn't want to lie to her. The thought of it actually gave him a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was bad enough already that she didn't know what it was he really did (or so he thought at least) let alone having to keep adding to that story with more false information. Yet was telling her what actually went down really the best option? In his mind it didn't seem like it, at least not right then. But she needed an answer, deserved an answer. "I picked a fight with the wrong person," he replied finally, a slight grimace crossing his features as he reached to hold his hand against the still protesting ribs. One...two...at least three felt cracked beneath his fingers and he took a few short breaths before looking up to meet her skittering gaze. "I...that's all I can say right now. Just please... just trust me when I say that it was for a good reason," There was a faint pleading look in his eyes, hoping she'd understand but not blaming her if she didn't take that as a good enough explanation. He sure as hell wouldn't have if someone were to tell him that after all so there was no good reason for her to either. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

What did they do to his brother after she fixed the shoulder? Cierra remembered vaguely the process of the dislocated shoulder- that much was for certain. However, now that she came to think of it, she had no idea what to do afterwards. Cas was such a mess she wasn’t sure where to begin after this either. Blood was covered all over him and she was able to tell just a little bit of what places hurt more than others. She was watching his face. Seeing his jaw clench with pain or a little bit of a tenser expression whenever he moved a certain area. The same face he made when popping the shoulder back into place as she tried to ignore the noise he tried to muffle. It was just a small clue, but clues she wasn’t sure if were just because of the movement or if he was just feeling it in general. Oh, she didn’t know! She didn’t know! Cierra’s book smarts didn’t really help her at this point unless he could find a magical manual nearby that would give her step-by-step instructions to help him. She would be able to remember it. Perhaps she should have looked it up so they could have told her what to do afterwards.

The only thing she could possibly do at that moment was try to think about the most obvious things he would need. First aide kid would probably give her some ideas and smack in the face kind of obvious once she went and received it. Whatever needed to happen, she was sure she needed that. Cas could at least be her instruction manual. What was one of the things that was gnawing at her was how many other times had he been like this before? How many times did one of her kind treat him like a fun play toy and toss him around. She didn’t think about it much because all it did was get her stomach turning (more than it already was). Her mind was blocked of all thoughts like that. All her mind was focused on was Cas at the present and how he managed to get that way today.

Her small praise made a bit of a smile on her face briefly with pride that it seemed she got it. It wasn’t every day she gained a compliment. The shoulder was luck. Nothing but a swipe of luck that she happened to know how to do that. Help a dislocated thumb or something she would have been clueless. It was funny, considering luck usually wasn’t with her. It must have been him. She watched him and bit her tongue from repeating herself when she noticed that his arm was moving a little bit. The worry that it was just going to snap right back out of place was still there, even though it was pretty clear that it wasn’t going to pop off of its own. Perhaps she should make a sling… oh of course! Obviously she would need a sling over the arm. Next on the list next to the first aid kit- make a sling. That she wasn’t as worried about since she would imagine her soft, thinner drying towels in the kitchen would be perfect after she found something to stable it in.

Now that she knew that, she still wasn’t finished with the shoulder. He probably shouldn’t have thanked her so soon, but it wasn’t to say that she would have him take it back. It filled her up with warmth inside as her shaky eyes were darting all over him. So she simply made her smile, ”Not quite the same as cleaning a scratch, huh?” Trying to light up just a little bit for her and his sake. She wasn’t sure about him, but she knew how much of a mess she was. Hopefully focusing and relating the first night they met would have been a little easier on her. It felt way different than the first night as his entire body was a giant group of scratches (she cared much more on top of everything). The question that she asked after that was probably a dumb one on her part. What else would a hunter be at? Still. She felt that she had to know and it all slipped out. Cierra wasn’t really expecting ‘well this thing I was hunting’ or anything. Perhaps a hint. If her human naïve appearance worked, she could act clueless through that kind of talk. It didn’t end up being that way though. He didn’t lie either. At least, she thought so. At his answer, her eyes gazed over him again with no less of a worry look. It confirmed a little of her fears. Was this going to be a usual worry now? It was his job.

What really wanted to come out of her mouth was a worried ‘please don’t do it again’ but the reality of that happening was none to slim. Another turn of her stomach. The answer should have been satisfying, but it just made Cierra more curious. Her fingers were starting to pick at each other in nervousness as she looked straight at him, seeing his plea for her not to try to pry it out of him. Cierra wasn’t really a prier anyways, but that look would have been it all. What could have possibly been a good enough reason for this? Must have been a heck of a reason, especially if he thought the same thing after. ”If you’re sure… I trust you…r judgment.” Before she could word things any stranger, she scurried off to her bathroom, scoping out the kit at the bottom of her skin under piles of stuff. Everything still had the wrapping on it. With that in one arm, she went through her closet to grab the homemade sling and found him again. She opened the kit with eyes widening. Uh… what… she stared at it. She hardly knew how to use any of that.

Not to mention she wasn’t sure where to begin or what else she needed to be helping with. For all Cierra knew, she should just give the kit to him and let him deal, but looking at him, she just wanted him to lay and rest. Speak only when needed. Her heart twisted as she held the cloth, wondering how to approach him without having to move him more than needed. He could lie there all night, it didn’t matter to her. As long as he was with her… she shook her head at her own thoughts, having to actually try to correct herself and convince herself that she meant with her as in not knocked out… yeah that’s what she meant. She came up close to him again and folded the towel out delicately, ”Hold still… it’s the best I can do.” She whispered, having apology in her voice for not being able to do more. To do everything. Very lightly, her hand curled at the bottom of his arm and over his head, trying to tie it, but finding her fingers were fumbling a bit. Her heart throbbed and her head hurt a little bit as she too, had to stay with him.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] There wasn't much you could do to help ease the pain still lingering from the dislocated shoulder other than swallow a handful of pills and wait for them to kick in. It was only a dull ache now as it was and that sort of feeling was nothing new to Cas. This might have been the worse beating he'd taken so far in his life as a hunter but he knew what it was to be in pain. Hazard of the job you could say. His tolerance for it was fairly high which helped plus the adrenaline hadn't all quite left his system yet and numbed things a good bit, likely disguising most of the lesser bumps and bruises for now. He could only imagine how he was going to feel come morning and quite honestly didn't want to think about that right then. Just getting through each moment was hard enough already. Cierra was helping as best she could but there was really only so much the poor girl could physically do. The worry that had yet to leave her face since she'd first opened the door and saw him standing there was tugging at his heart. Cason hated making her feel that way. If anything he wanted to keep away any fear from her mind, not be the cause of it. So far it seemed his track record around her wasn't that great though. Granted he'd saved her from a bad situation that first night back at the bar but the fear on her face towards the warlock had simply been transferred towards him as he'd drug her out of the place and into his truck. Granted that fear had slowly faded as the night had gone on but he still had never wanted to be the cause of that look in her eyes again. Yet here he was doing exactly that. This time though it wasn't fear of him but fear for him and for some reason that was almost worse because it brought such a desperate look to her eyes. If he'd had a clearer head just then the realization that such a thing meant she must have cared about him likely would have sunk in but with the way things were he just didn't want her to be so scared. That lingering feeling that he was about to pass out at any second had lessened since she'd popped his shoulder back into place but he certainly wasn't ready to try any quick movement anytime soon. If he had one goal it was to not pass out on her at any point, something he was certain would send her into full on panic mode were it to happen. The briefest of smiles did pull at her lips when he praised her job at helping him with the shoulder, easing the strain around her eyes ever so slightly as she followed his remark with a lighter toned one of her own. A faint smile of his own tugged at the hunter's lips as the words brought back memories of their first encounter which had also ended with both of them on the business end of the first aid kit. "Not quite. But I'd say I'm in good hands either way though," She might not have been the most experienced with this sort of thing but Cas knew she would give it her all and that's exactly what he needed. There was no denying he had some fairly serious injuries and quite honestly should have gone to the ER when it came right down to it. But going there meant questions and there were no answers he could give that wouldn't make him look suspicious, give away things he couldn't afford to give away. Not to mention the fact that people who started ranting and raving about monsters and hunting them tended to be passed off to the pysch ward. Not that he hadn't expected some questions from Cierra. Someone didn't just show up at your door beat half to death without you having more than few things that needed answering. Unlike the hospital staff though, he trusted her, not only to believe whatever it was he told her at least for the time being but to not ship him off to the looney bin. Lying to her had never been part of the plan but neither had been outright telling her the truth. Not yet at any rate. He wanted to though, crazy as that might have sounded. For some reason he wanted her to know what it was he actually did and not the made up bounty hunter crap he'd told her back at the bar that night but the honest truth. He'd been contemplating it, even before this little run in with the vampire, but now it somewhow seemed even more important that she know. He couldn't really even explain why he felt that way he just did. This moment though wasn't the time. She already had too much being thrown at her just now and he was concentrating on getting himself put back together to take the time to explain things. At least in the way he wanted to do so. It was clear his words only served to create a million more questions but she didn't say anything else, just gazed at him with that worried look in her eyes. It was killing him to not be able to tell her right then and there what had really happened, not that knowing such a thing would have eased her anxiousness any but at least she'd know he wasn't lying to her. That was the worst thought. If there was one thing he didn't want her to do it was to feel she couldn't trust him. The hesitant way she spoke didn't ease that fear any either even though she did say she trusted his judgement. His eyes closed briefly as he cursed mentally at himself in frustration as she hurried off to the bathroom. Damn it... He was going explain things to her, he had to, but just not right then. Turning his focus back on the present moment he slowly shrugged out of the flannel over shirt he was wearing, leaving the gray t-shirt on only because the thought of getting it off was far too painful right at the moment. He'd have to sooner or later though, if only because there were a couple good sized gouges, one across his chest and one down his right side that needed cleaned up so they wouldn't get infected. She reappeared in front of him a second later, holding a first aide kit that hadn't ever even been opened it seemed and looking at it as if it were some sort of alien artifact. Cas might have chuckled a little at the expression on her face as she opened the kit had she not also started to look completely overwhelmed as well. Yet she was still trying, giving it all she had as she stepped closer, a soft towel in her hands. The tone of her voice about broke his heart, as if she was somehow failing him by not knowing more or being able to do more, a fact proven even more obvious as she attempted to tie the sling, her fingers fumbling nervously. "Cierra, baby, look at me," he spoke softly, halting her efforts for a moment with his other arm before reaching up to gently direct her face so she was looking at him. "You're doing fine, sweetie. Calm down, deep breath, it's gonna be alright," If anything he wanted her to know she wasn't messing up, wasn't letting him down and that she was exactly the person he wanted next to him just then. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

Since the girl knew she was everything that could have been emotional, one of her biggest fears was to get hurt. Obviously- no one wanted to get hurt, but she tried to avoid it as much as she could. A couple of years ago, she made a vow to herself that she wouldn’t get close to anyone so that she couldn’t have possibly been hurt that way. However, Cierra found that with her personality, she couldn’t do it. Cierra just clung and trusted so much more easily. She kept repeating in her head to let it go and not share, but she couldn’t help herself. It was like telling a dog to suddenly start acting like a cat. It felt against her nature to be anything else, but it did come with its toll sometimes. That was why she wanted all in her mind to believe that Cas didn’t like her. If she paid closer attention, she would have seen the flat obvious signs all around her. Though, if she had believed it, and it didn’t turn out to be true, it would probably squash her flat. Despite the flowers, smiles, and moments of overwhelming warmth, her mind made something else up for it.

Even now she was starting to think that way. It was easier to just because her mind was so distracted from everything else. She was sure that later she would be pondering over everything. That moment would come though. Right now, the hurt Cas was in her mind and her ability to easily mess things up. Not to mention there was that weird factor with her being more of a klutz when Cas was around. What was worst was she couldn’t help him the way she wanted to. Though she may have been helping with injuries, she could still see the pain in his face. Even if she hadn’t looked at his face the whole time, the rest of his body was covered in bruises and blood. Probably one thing was needing to clean up all of the open wounds and such. Cierra didn’t even need to see the rest of his body to know that his torso was probably covered in some awful collection of worlds of hurt. Just from the spots on his shirt and the evidence in the parts she was able to see. She needed a giant human band aide.

Wait- pain. Pain pills. Oh jeez, why hadn’t she thought about something so simple before?! She had some. Somewhere. It was hinted to her that she could take some Tylenol PM to help with her sleeping and since that was also a painkiller, that could defiantly work. Then she wanted to smack herself in the head. No, she couldn’t give him that yet. It would put him right to sleep when she was already afraid of him passing out on her. Yeah, what a brilliant idea. Her head was spinning even faster as her worry was increasing by the rapid seconds. The worry meter on her felt endless. Every little thing was going to make it topple over. At least he had reached her. At this condition, she wouldn’t have been surprised if he had to crawl up the steps. Her heart ached a little bit as she pictured it. Automatically she had to retract that from her mind. Oh, Cas, what happened to you?

The small moment of exchanged smile made her actually a little better. Her own comment made her ease a bit but the fact he piled on made her even more so. Of course she was still freaking out, but less to the level of where she was about to explode. In fact, the normal faint pink came to her cheeks when he said he was in good hands either way. She wished she could be as confident as he was in all of this. So far, the luck that was striking Cierra was remarkable. It was starting to fade as soon as she realized that she hadn’t used a first aide kit since the last time at Cas’. And he had been there to tell her what to use while she didn’t want to ask him too many questions. Because he would give too many answers. His hurt pained voice was already enough for her. She wanted to say ‘You could be in better’ but she always hated saying things like that. It made her feel like she was fishing for a compliment. In reality, she just felt the need to clarify. No, she kept that to herself. Her heart was racing dramatically at every sight of him. Perhaps when she ducked over to get the first aide kit should have been a good thing considering the timing.

Okay, new goal. Not to pass out herself. With the dizziness, the blood, and her shaking eyes, she did feel a little light headed. She wasn’t even the one who had gotten beat up. My goodness. Cierra tried to direct her mind to a positive state, as that’s what she tried to do with others. At least she HAD a first aide kit. Just because it was recommended by just about every department you could think of didn’t mean everyone listened and had one. Thinking over and over to herself, she decided that was probably the only positive thing that was going through her mind right about then besides at least Cas made it here. She didn’t even want to let her mind wander to what would have happened if she didn’t. There was a shiver that ran up her spine as she tried to block thought. Oh no, focus. Focus. Her hands grasped the kit tighter, feeling the towel compress under her hands.

She thought it was pretty ridiculous of herself at a time like this to have her mind divert just a little bit to how close they were. This was not the time to feel her heart jump at his voice and feel like she almost stopped breathing whenever she got close. But the fact is the girl with the large crush couldn’t help herself. Crush didn’t even seem like the word for it. Crush was something she had in high school on a boy she never talked to. This… she didn’t know what to call it. As if Cas could hear every negative and worried thought in her mind, his voice spoke up as she was struggling with the tying of the sling. What felt almost like slow motion, his hand moved her face toward his. Even under the swelling eye, she could see the bright green eyes that she loved adored so much. Her brain stopped running through a moment to where she heard nothing but silence. Her own heart seemed to be the only thing she could hear, and wow was it loud. The baby probably hit her harder than it should have. Sweetheart. Baby. Same night. The grown woman didn’t know what to do.

He continued and it was something that made her eyes still and the room stopped spinning. Her mind had told her just about every opposite way you could phrase his sentence, but he seemed so believable. ”Are you sure?” She asked softly, succeeding in tying his sling and taking one hand to put it on his warm free hand. ”You’re so beat up…” She told him, barely above a whisper. Just in this moment, it was slow. Not the racing around trying to figure out what she could do but a very slow eye gaze that she would have been okay with lasting forever. She broke the gaze for a moment, just to fiddle with the first aide kit, but finding her eyes meeting back with his again. Trying to do her job and focusing was really hard with this man. Really, very hard.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] During that excruciatingly long fifteen minutes where he'd gotten the living hell beat out of him there was one thing that had been at the forefront of his mind. That being if he didn't make it out of that alley alive he was always going to regret not telling Cierra what he felt for her. Not that he'd completely hidden them, there were plenty of moments that had occured between them, shared smiles, a gentle touch every so often, the flowers on her birthday, the way he was always so protective over her. Glimpses but nothing that would really give her a clear picture of just how much she meant to him. How much he loved her. It had taken him a while to come to terms with that last word. Since losing Natalie he'd avoided any other romantic relationships like the plague and had thrown himself into hunting. It had worked for the past few years and he'd told himself he was content with things staying that way. No complications, no worry about feeling that sort of pain ever again like he had with Natalie. And then she had happened. Been figuratively and almost literally thrown into his lap and from that very second on the hardened resolve he'd worked so hard to build had been torn down like it was made out of paper. With absolutely no effort at all the girl had worked her way into his heart and it felt like she'd been there his whole life. He'd loved Natalie and there would always be a part of him that missed her, but this, this was such a different feeling than what he'd felt for her. Maybe it was because he was no longer the same man he'd been back then. Or maybe Cierra was the one he was meant to be with all along and it had taken all that had happened to him so far in his life to prepare him for this moment now. Funny, how deep your thoughts could somehow manage to go when faced with the prospect of death. If anything they certainly served to steel his determination to get out of that fight alive (or as close to alive as possible) and tell her. Cason would have been the first to admit he was in worse shape than he'd bargained or prepared to be in upon arriving at her door though. Even now that his shoulder was back in place and the pain eased slightly the room still kept spinning if he tried to move too fast. And the last thing he wanted to do was pass out on her. In fact that was his number one goal, stay awake and upright. So far so good but he could still see the worry in her eyes, written in every corner of her face, every tone of her voice. She was just flat out going insane with worry over him, which, and he felt slightly guilty even admitting it to himself, pleased him a little more than it probably should have. But worry meant she cared and bolstered his courage that he wasn't the only one with feelings that were definitely deeper than just friendship. Because that brought up a whole other level of issues, that if she didn't feel as strongly for him as he did for her that it would ruin the good friendship they had now. Cas wasn't normally a guy to shy away from just putting himself right out there on most issues. In fact he'd been told by Jude more than once his mouth would get him in trouble one day. So why the hell he always felt like a teenage boy trying to work up the courage to ask the cute girl at school to prom around her he had no idea. Or rather knew full well why and that was the fact that for the first time in a long time he actually cared about losing someone. Just the thought of not seeing her anymore took his breath away, like a punch in the gut. Another fact that wasn't helping matters was how fuzzy his mind still felt, that and the pain every movement sent jolting through him. Trying to say more than a few words was hard when every breath hurt like hell and seeing as he was already having a hard time figuring out how to tell her how he felt that wasn't helping matters in the least. So for now his original plan of telling her right off how he felt was put on hold in favor of telling her where it hurt the most and trying not to show just how much it hurt as best as possible. Because that would only make her fret more and Cas could see she was already hanging on by the skin of her teeth as it was. The look of complete confusion on her face as she looked at the first aide kit tugged at his heart, loving her so much for the simple fact that she was trying so hard even as far out of her comfort zone as this whole situation was. He had his own moment of concern though when he realized how badly she was shaking while trying to tie the sling around his arm. The last thing he wanted was to see her pass out in front of him. The word of endearment had once again just sort of found its way to the forefront of the sentence, falling off his tongue as naturally as her name would have. It certainly made her pause, looking at him with an almost startled look but one that slowly eased into a calmer expression as his words apparently had the desired effect. Carefully she finished tying the sling around his arm and the effort was well worth it as it took the pressure off his shoulder and eased the ache that still lingered. The quiet sound of her voice hit his ears tentatively and he glanced down as she put her hand over his and without even thinking turned his over to intertwine his fingers through hers. "One hundred and ten percent sure," he returned just as softly, a small smile tugging at one side of his mouth. He was beat up but not so much that he wasn't suddenly aware of just how close they were at that moment or how he could have easily stared into her eyes for the rest of the night. For a moment she looked down in the typical shy Cierra fashion but unlike a lot of other times she looked back up a moment later and that proved to be his undoing. Slowly he leaned in closer until their lips met, kissing her softly before pulling back just enough to look her in the eyes. "I'm not going anywhere, ok? I promise you that," words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

Cierra’s little hand full of friends did all act one thing toward her- protective. She wasn’t sure if it was because her nature was to be a little too close with everyone, but it seemed that everyone narrowed their eyes whenever they saw someone that was a threat. Many people might find it annoying, as if it were a sign that she couldn’t take care of herself. She wasn’t most people. She knew very well that she had a hard time and it showed how loved she seemed to be. Protective was a compliment. They wanted her to be safe. Her own family didn’t give her that kind of luxury. Some were more protective than others, and one thing she noticed from Cas right away was that he seemed to always watch her shoulder. It made sense having the life of a hunter. It should have been pretty common among people close to him. Yet, when he was doing it, her heart thudded and she felt like he might as well been a hero at her side. Who needed something like a guardian angel when she had someone like Cason?

Which was why the turn of events were all that more ironic. Her hero was injured. Gravely injured. Injured to the point where Cierra wanted to do absolutely everything so that he would be able to heal. She remembered when she came to Vi with a gash in her head- from Cas’ truck- and she just had her drink a potion. It tickled for a bit but then it was all better. She wished she could whip one of those right up. That would help him so much. Even calling a hospital or something, but again, as she had thought many times in her head, he wasn’t going to have that. She had no idea what kind of supernatural might have beat him around like that, but she was so glad that he managed to get out of there alive. Clearly they wanted him to feel some pain. Oh, he was feeling it. Cierra couldn’t even imagine that kind of pain. Sometimes her emotions came from when other things in pain and seeing Cason like this was killing her. Not much could be done.

No matter how much she tried to keep her mind in place, she couldn’t help but start thinking about everything else as well. What were they going to do afterwards? The man couldn’t stay awake forever and she didn’t have the heart to have him leave after this. Even if he looked brand new, her paranoid was going to want to see he was one hundred percent okay. Especially after her little medical fix up. Yet, it wasn’t as if Cierra was going to pull him back if he was leaving. She would rather be dragging back behind him all the way in the attempt or she would be told to sit still, in which she would obey like the dog she was. There was that phrase ‘cross the bridge when we get there’ but all she saw ahead of her was the bridge coming up and not being able to ignore it. Focusing at one thing at a time was impossible for her. She had been trying for the past however long Cason had been here in front of her. It wasn’t exactly successful. Cierra was afraid of many things, but probably one of the ones besides the obvious was disappointing him at all. He came to her door for help and she was trying all the ways she knew how.

That was one of the reasons why hearing him say those words meant more to her than he would have believed. Although she was also a little preoccupied by these nicknames he liked to give her. Especially when her mind was trying to stay off of him in that way. Cierra didn’t need to be silently fangirling when he needed numerous help. Every bit of him needed to be fixed up. What was even aching her more was she knew the reality of not being able to get it done tonight. Between how much blood he probably lost, the time of night, and just being in the physical condition in general, he wasn’t going to last all night. Neither was she for that matter. Though she had trouble sleeping, she still felt tired. It was only a matter of time before the blood would stop pumping through her body enough to keep her about as alert as a rabbit. Maybe. She also thought it would have worn off by now but all it was doing was speeding everything up. Her heart race looking at Cason’s eyes was… probably unhealthy. And unneeded. But she couldn’t help it. Who could?

She didn’t have to look at her own hand to feel his hand under her fingertips, automatically seeming to mingle with one another. Her soft voice was returned by a very deep soft voice of his and she could have fell forward to lean on him then stay there forever, but she didn’t need to tempt herself. That was movie talk. This must have been a sign she had been watching too many hopeless romantic movies. She struggled for something to say to ease her tossing and turning stomach when the last thing she expected came upon her. Her face got closer to him. Oh no, was she falling forward? No, no, no, she was still. The lips brushed against each other for a moment and Cierra took a breath in but not being able to let it out. She could feel his lips against hers. Actually feel it. Feel her kiss back for the moment it lasted. The woman had only received a small handful of kisses through her life and just a touch like this was making her unexpected head spin. As if this happened all the time. He broke and her breath came out in a rush. Her eyes fluttered open and half expected her to be looking at a ceiling from waking up but instead met those same eyes. The most beautiful pair she could have imagined. He was speaking. Words. Words. Cierra was trying to comprehend what happened but only ended up making a large smile with seemed to be a bit of a nervous breath take in.

It was transferring her heart soared with her mind bustling with questions. Did this mean? How was there any other way to interrupt that?! Cierra hadn’t known Cason to be the type of guy who did that regularly. Or the flirt to do that just to get her calmed down (because if anything she was freaking out inside and out with a whole different way) Now she was going to have to form words. Cierra wasn’t friends with words anyways and now… He wasn’t going anywhere. Oh she believed him. Most of the time there was doubt in her eyes but she believed every word of that. She closed her eyes once again, wanting to use her other senses for a moment. She could feel his breath… scent… her hand still gripping his. This was so unreal. ”Oh Cas…” Start. Beginning. Couldn’t finish. She wanted to kiss him again, but her usual timid personality kept her from and saying instead, ”I was hoping you wouldn’t and I…I just can't believe..” She couldn’t finish that much, so she stopped herself, feeling that her head might explode and not from the headache that had suddenly disappeared. Was this happening? Was this real? Oh she hoped with all her heart it was.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] Cas knew if he was smart he would have gone to the hospital, checked himself in the ER and waited for a doctor to tell him everything messed up about his body right now. Given the people who asked for and got paid to do what he was now asking Cierra to do. Someone who probably wanted nothing more than to shy away from the blood and the bruises covering him. Most people wouldn't have given a second thought to getting medical treatment right away, probably the first place their minds would have jumped too in fact. The problem, however was that he wasn't most people or at least not career wise that is. And really how did you try and explain something like this? He looked like he'd been mauled by a group of angry bears and not giving them an explanation would only make them suspicious and possibly involve the police which was the last thing he needed happening. After all who was going to believe the story that he hunted the things that went bump in the night? Not very many people that was who. Maybe the fellow patients he'd find himself spending quality time with in the nut house but that was probably about it. Honestly he couldn't even remember the last time he'd gone to an actual hospital or even an urgent care. Either he stitched himself up the best he could or he'd get help from Jude or Sam for the jobs that required a little more attention. Which explained all of the little (and not so little) scars scattered across his body, most of which could probably have been avoided if he'd actually had them taken care of professionally. Cas wasn't really all that concerned with looking like a male model or anything. Besides each scar carried a lesson with it that reminded him of what not to do the next time around. It was almost like the more you had the more cred you got as a hunter, not that Cason was overly concerned about that either. He didn't do it for the glory or the thrill. He did it to keep people safe. People like Natalie who hadn't even had a chance or like Cierra who was sweet and unnassuming and the perfect target. Although lately it seemed his priorities had shifted to her and her alone, hunting wise and outside of that. And up until now he'd kept her out of the hunting side of things, physically speaking at least. Every other time they'd been together it had been light-hearted and fun, coffee, mini-golf or just a late night conversation in the tiny living room of her little apartment. Normal, ordinary things that anyone else would do while getting to know someone. This though, this had never been a part of that plan. If anything he had hoped to keep this side of himself out of her life. She didn't need that, didn't need his issues spilling over into her life. Especially since his issues were of the sort that could maybe end up getting you killed. Yet somehow here he was sitting on her bed, beat all to hell and probably freaking her out like no other. Yep, way to win a girl's heart Cason. Regular Romeo right there. If anyone's heart was being even more won over it was his when it really came down to it. She was trying so hard to do whatever he needed her to do, even if she wasn't quite sure of herself or how to do something. Honestly he'd been about ready to kiss her for it the moment she'd flung open that door and pulled him inside. Then again he'd been ready to kiss her a while ago he just hadn't felt like he'd found that right moment to take that step yet. I mean, there were still moments when he'd start to question if he even had a shot with her at all. He really really wanted to believe he did, that those warm smiles and red cheeks had meant what he took them to mean. It seemed like it had been such a long time since he'd been in that position though, with feelings like this for someone. Natalie had been his first real crush and the only woman he'd been with pretty much his whole life. High school sweethearts all the way up to their engagement. After she died he hadn't even wanted to get back out there on the dating scene so to speak. Partially out of grief and mostly because he had one goal set in his mind and that was kill every single supernatural bastard out there. Cierra was the first woman to cross his path since Natalie's death to steal his attention away from that goal. Since that first action packed night at the bar his feelings for her had been steadily growing stronger, deeper and he finally realized it was more than just a crush. He loved this girl. Telling her that tonight hadn't been something he'd consciously planned, in fact it hadn't really passed through his mind even as he'd driven straight to her apartment after getting out of the alley. What he had been thinking of was staying awake, nursing his shoulder and getting to her as quickly as possible to make sure she was safe. And at first that was all both of them seemed to be focusing on, him gritting his teeth through the pain and Cierra frantically doing whatever she could to help him. But then things were slowing down and suddenly he was noticing more than just the pain coursing through his body. Like how close she was to him as she attempted to tie the sling around his arm, the gentle touch of her hand against his back, the near panic in her big brown eyes when she brought out the first aid kit. Maybe it was the lingering adrenaline still in his system but everything seemed intensified, every touch, every sound, and almost like things were in slow motion. Cas hadn't planned on kissing her then, but somewhere in between his attempts at reassurance and her hesitant worry over him combined with the sudden closeness between them just then had him leaning in towards her almost before he knew he was even moving. For as much as the action meant it was relatively short lived, mostly thanks to the fact that he had half surprised himself by doing it as well as Cierra judging from the quick intake of breath she gave. She hadn't pulled away though which gave him some assurance that it hadn't been a mistake to give in to the urge but there was still that slight bit of nervousness in his stomach. What if she really didn't have any deeper feelings for him than just as friends? What if he'd just stepped over the line? If he ruined things between them he'd never forgive himself. Those thoughts came in quick little snippets pulling at the back of his mind, ones that he did his best to push behind the wall of confidence he had built up just now for her sake. The one that had his voice sounding completely and totally certain as he assured her he was not going anywhere, now or later. Even if she didn't share the same feelings for him that he did towards her. The poor girl had something of a dazed look in her eyes as she stared back at him, obviously still processing what had just happened and when she finally spoke the short exclamation followed by his name almost had him wince to brace himself for disappointment. As confident as he was in every other aspect of things when it came to this sort of thing he felt completely out of his element. All of the nerves were put to rest though as she continued a moment later, her words slightly faltering but happy and sounded as relieved as he suddenly felt. He'd been apparently holding his breath without even realizing it because the next breath he took was deeper than his injured ribs would allow without protest. Grimacing, it still didn't stop the smile from parting his lips at her words. "I, uh, had planned on this being a little more romantic, flowers or candlelight or something at least but I'm uh, not too good with mushy I guess," he admitted with a faintly apologetic look in his eyes before reaching upward to gently brush back a stray strand of hair from her cheek. Right here right now was probably about as unromantic as you could get, waking her up at three in the morning to find him beat and bloody and barely able to stand on his own two feet. Although considering their track record so far when it came to trouble he really should have known better than to expect your normal romantic setting to just happen. Or at least the one people always seemed to set as the model for romantic. Honestly though when it came right down to it Cason knew he wasn't the sort of guy to follow those sort of expectations anyway. It was either take it or leave it with him like it or not. Still when it came to Cierra he would have turned his whole world upside if it meant doing something he knew would make her happy. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

Coming from someone as emotion as she was, she couldn’t even fathom what being a hunter was like. The supernatural side of her wasn’t sure why that thought even came to mind. Hunters were considered evil. They didn’t have any thought or question in whoever they killed, so in a sense, they brought it on themselves. However, the Cierra part of her had thought about this before. She couldn’t imagine going and killing someone- even if a time of self-defense. Hunters did that for a living, sometimes never coming back. Some supernatural were awful. Shapeshifters and mermaids didn’t cause problems. It was the werewolves, vampires, and demons. All of those scared her. Just imagining facing one of those creatures? Coming home every night and that’s what everyone did for a living? It had to be hard on all of them. Perhaps some more than others. Some hunters she heard about probably didn’t care, but now that she knew Cas, she couldn’t picture it. She never wanted to look too deep into it. The pure thought of it was making her heart squeeze.

That was the thing. Hunters. Supernatural falling in love with a hunter wasn’t unheard of, but it sure wasn’t common. And it was nowhere near smiled upon. In fact, both of the communities seemed to loathe someone from it. She remembered how her entire family felt about her cousin’s parents. How the hunter turned on the mother as soon as he figured out the truth. In her mind, she could still picture her own parents snapping over the phone with each other. Other families from Manuka would come to visit the large LaBeau estate and gossip about it loudly. Cierra- being so young- hadn’t understood it then, but she understood it now. At least, she understood what it was they were angry about. Why was a different matter. The idealist thought perhaps everyone should just see whoever the pair was clearly in love. But then the result of her aunt and almost uncle’s experience kept her from opening her mouth.

In her young girl fantasies, of course she had thought about what would happen if Cas loved her the way she loved him. What could she say? She had a lot of day dreaming down time at work. In her head, she forgot everything about him being a hunter. Didn’t care. Wait, she didn’t care. It was just… others cared. Some of her protective friends were a little weary of her hanging around with someone whose entire job was to kill her. Her family could never find out. All of them would be so livid. But in her head, that even made it closer for the pair of them. That he would stick around her despite her making sure that he never saw her family. Not that her family cared enough anyway. Even with Cierra’s non-lying ability, she would able to hide it easily. The romantic Cierra didn’t care about all the other stuff that was going around her. Now it was starting to go through her head. More for his sake. She didn’t want to put all of this on him. The insecurities of a woman who was always seemed to be second place.

It was happening. She almost forgot that he was still broken and bruised. All her mind was able to wrap around was those eyes and lips in front of her. This was way more than she had ever expected her to receive. Even in her biggest daydreams, she couldn’t have thought up this. Cason might have been thinking how weird timing this was, but to Cierra, all of it was unbelievable. She could be there. She could take care of him. Learn how to bandage properly. She felt like she could do all of these things. Again more of the idealist instead of living in reality. For not the first time tonight, a smile appeared on her face as she attempted to form more words. She could feel his breath and wanted to warn him to be careful of his ribs. Hers were even hurting and nothing but this happened to them. The only way she warned him was perking herself a little taller (but considering she was a shorty, there wasn’t much effect) but staying where she was. She wasn’t going to leave this spot unless he asked. She also didn’t know how long this was going to last, so she put this moment very much into every bit of her memory. Please don’t leave. He said he wouldn’t leave.

At his comment, she started a round of soft giggling. Some of it nervous and other just having so much in her she didn’t know what to do with it. Flowers, candlelights? Goodness, Cason was so adorable. So sweet. She felt his hand just touch her cheek to put some of the hair from her crazy head out of her face. Even in her lovey dovey experiences, that hadn’t happened before. Such a simple little move that was enough to make her start breathing a little more shallow. Her heart pounding in her ears as her entire body swept over a heat wave. Her head focused on the word ‘planned’ as well. Her eyes glanced over to the counter where Cas’ flowers for her birthday were still. Not as alive as they once were, but still blooming well. ”Actually- the flowers are covered. You don’t have to worry about me being picky anyway.” There was still a little giggle to her voice. Oh good, now she was going to be a constant giggling girl at this rate. What she mistaken for a giggle was more of her just being just about as happy as she ever could be.

Now that she was starting to think, her mind was racing. There was something wrong. As much as she told herself it was okay he was a hunter, she felt like she had to say something about it. Cierra was one hundred percent willing to take care of the hunter, but she was still frightened. She got to know Cas as himself but she would always remember that other Cason. That Cas that would come out to protect her again. She just didn’t want the gun to point the opposite way. Knowing him, she’d say he’d never do a thing like that. But the logical side of her remembered ‘that’s what Max’s mom said. There was also always the constant fear of getting hurt, but that was less important. It was killing her to try to tell him ‘but this hunting thing you do’ (especially since she wasn’t supposed to know about it). She didn’t want to say it. Plus, it wasn’t just dangerous for her. For him? Oh yes. She wouldn’t forgive herself if something happened to him at the expense of making her as happy as could be. Without even having another thought, she leaned in and kissed him again.

This time, to get more of a last taste before she brought something up. Something in her chest she felt like he had to be aware of. The same taste and explosion came across as she gently pulled back (knowing how much he had been hit in the face as well). ”But…” She started hastily with. Cierra knew how she was. Clingy. Needy. He didn’t want her to say whatever it was he had to and then realizing he couldn’t handle that. Probably because that’s what Derik did. But she didn’t want to say it in a way to make it sound like she didn’t want it. Oh jeez how she wanted it. She felt like she mattered. Like she was important. Like she got her first place. ”I can be a lot to deal with sometimes. And you have so much with your job,” Luck that she put ‘job’ in that sentence, ”I don’t want to put too much on you.” Too much of what she didn’t want to clarify. As much as she needed to point out that she was emotional and hard to deal with, she didn’t want to change his mind. She knew he liked her. But how much. Enough to change his mind? As much as she knew it might be better, she didn’t want that. She wanted what was going on now. Even if it came with the battle scars he had. Cierra felt like she could help heal those scars. If anything, the girl was going to try.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]

[CASON FLYNN ELLERY]

AND MY SHIRT IS TURNING RED

I'M SPINNING AROUND SOLDIER DOWN

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: B8B8B8; border: #550505 solid 4px; width: 400px; padding: 15 5 15 5px;] If Cierra had been given the chance to meet Cason five years or so ago she probably wouldn't have recognized the man. Appearance wise of course he didn't look much different, a few more lines of care around his eyes than there used to be but no major changes. Personality wise though he would have seemed a different man. Not entirely he supposed because deep down those core traits that make everyone who they are were still there. Some just now longer showed up as often as they used to and others were expressed quite differently than they had before Natalie's death. Before he knew what was out there in the world. Growing up fairly sheltered by his parents and then living in a small town for the later half of his childhood where everyone knew each other and locking your doors at night was pretty much unheard of had given him a sense of security. False security he knew know but back then the world had certainly seemed safe. Or safe enough at least. Finding out that everything you thought about the world, who lived in it and that monsters didn't just exist under beds and in closets well it was like getting a hard hit to the gut. Knocked you breathless for a few minutes and had your mind spinning. Then you had two options. Either you turned tail and ran scared while looking over your shoulder every two seconds or you got up, took a deep breath and met the bastards head on. He'd obviously chosen the latter option and he didn't regret it for a minute. He might not have been able to change the fact that there were creatures out there that could only come from someone's worst nightmares but he could make sure they didn't destroy someone else's life too. It wasn't an easy life though and despite how sweet the feeling of revenge had been at first that eventually grew stale as well and in the end there were days he questioned his reasons. Getting out though, it wasn't easy. Cas honestly wasn't sure he'd ever be able to really step away from the life. Not fully at any rate. And so far he hadn't had any reasons to consider that sort of move anyway. There were still too many evil sons of bitches out there to take care of as far as he was concerned to even think about walking away from the job. Too many innocent people who had no idea what they shared their world with, what sorts of things they interacted with on a daily basis. And someone had to make sure they stayed that way, innocent. Because once you knew, your life would never be the same. It was why every fiber of his being was fighting against telling Cierra what he did because it meant flipping her life upside down. But he didn't want to lie to her either. In his mind that would have been worse than her knowing really. Because if there was one thing he wanted her to know it was that she could trust him completely totally. As far as he was concerned as long as he was around nothing bad was going to happen to her. He'd make sure of it. Had made sure of it so far since they'd first met. He hadn't wanted her to have to see the after effects of those efforts though either, a goal he'd not quite succeeded in accomplishing obviously. Granted this was probably one of the worst beatings he'd taken from a supernatural in a long time but he knew that it wouldn't have mattered how badly hurt he was she would still look just as worried. It was this he didn't want her to have to deal with though. To put this weight on her. The worry and fear for his safety. It was asking a lot. Too much really. He wouldn't have blamed her if she'd simply shook her head and told him to go somewhere else, a hospital, a friends somewhere but just to leave. It would have hurt like hell, worse than any of the physical injuries but he would have understood. But she hadn't. That was the one thing running through the back of his mind behind everything else that had been going on since she had pulled him through the door. She hadn't asked him to please leave or even so much insinuated that she wanted him to but was too sweet to ask. Her only fear seemed to be that she was somehow going to let him down while trying to help him. Which was why, even though he hadn't been planning on confessing those feelings just now, he'd felt the need to tell her exactly what she meant to him. To let her know just how deeply he cared. And her response in return only served to make every single bruise, cut and broken bone more than worth the pain. Her soft giggles had him smiling, loving the sound and hoping from now on he would have the chance to hear it more often. Following her glance towards the other side of the room, his smile widened at the sight of the flowers he'd sent to the coffee shop for her birthday, looking surprisingly fresh still all things considered. The fact that she still had them out and on display made him happier than she probably could have guessed since he'd sent them he had no clue what her feelings towards him were aside from friendship. "I still want you to have all of that though. You deserve it," He returned softly, still glad to see her so happy even without all the bells and whistles that the world thought of as 'romantic'. Things grew quiet between them for a moment as he glanced away from the flowers back to her face and noted the sudden change, a more thoughtful look crossing it. Wondering what it was that might have brought it on and fearing it had something to do with what had caused him to come to her apartment looking like this. Before he could say anything though she surprised him by leaning in and kissing him, letting it linger a little longer this time than the first. Cas happily kissed back, not really even caring if his lips were a little sore. She was gentle enough besides, which only made him want to kiss her more. However, there was obviously something on her mind as she pulled back slightly before starting out with a hastily formed 'but..' that instantly sent a flutter of anxiety through his stomach. But what? His first thoughts were that it was something to do with him, the secrecy so far about what he did for a living and that she wasn't sure she wanted to deal with something like that. Certainly a hurried and unproven conclusion but one that he couldn't help but guess as a possible reason for that horrible little word. He didn't interrupt, even though he wanted to instantly blurt out 'what's wrong' in response and once she started explaining he was so very glad he hadn't. Likely would have only made her feel more nervous than she clearly already was. A gentle frown crossed his forehead at her words, wondering why she would even think that about herself though he guessed it was more likely something she'd been told she was by someone else. Someone who clearly hadn't realized what they'd had, a mistake he wasn't about to make. Cupping both hands gently against either side of her face so she couldn't look away, Cason shook his head slightly. "I promise you that there is nothing you could do that would ever put too much on me, sweetheart," If anything she gave him much more than she could take away. With her he was happy and that, for him at least, had been a rare feeling up until meeting her. "And as far as being a lot to deal with I think I beat you out on that score," He added with a slightly wry smile, clearly refering to the events of the night so far. Brushing his thumb across her cheek, he added softly, "I love you, Cierra," For some people those three words were thrown out left and right but he wasn't one of those people. When he said it he meant it. Hopefully it wasn't too soon. Although if that didn't scare her away then what he needed to tell her next probably would. Lowering his hands back down from her face, he reached to rub the back of his neck with one of them, biting his lip slightly. "There is...there's something I need to tell you though," he started somewhat hesitantly, not even sure how he was going to explain this to her but knowing there was no way he could keep it from her any longer. "It's about my job. I'm not exactly a bounty hunter, at least not like you think," He paused then, glancing up to meet her gaze and hoping this wasn't going to just ruin the last few minutes they'd just shared. words; a lot tag; cierra<3 note; somanysquees!! template made by missickle

[/td][/tr][/table][/center]

[cierra]

THAT IT BEATS MY HEART

[/color][/font]
to black and blue[/center]

The fact all of this was happening was so unbelievable. Cierra had the constant struggle with being second or little in whatever she did. Not even second. More of just under what needed to be achieved to receive recognition. She couldn’t remember a time where she got a first place ribbon. Though her 4.0, she ended up being 3rd ranked in her class. There was once of an attempt of sports, but pretty much failed in middle school. Just everything. It bothered her little. Sure, sometimes it really showed and made her back up a few steps. Other times, it was just how things happened. Without much to compare it to, she didn’t really see most of it. She saw the way her siblings had flown through life and did everything they were supposed to. That she seemed to notice. Everything else kind of flew by her mind. She’d stop to wave at it, but it wouldn’t linger too awful long. At least, she would try not to let it linger. Other things usually occupied her mind- as she tried to be a selfless person.

But right now? She felt as if any other person would love to be in her spot right now. No other spot would be better. Even with the beaten and bruised up Cason. Something warm and whole filled inside her that made her bubbly and happy. It also was making her a little light headed, but that could have just been all of this ‘excitement’ combined with these sudden change of words. It was strange- how words could really just get to her. She was terrible with words, as they fumbled all over the place, but spoken to her meant so much more. Cas probably couldn’t have said anything more to really touch that romantic part of Cierra. The majority of Cierra. He might as well said that the pair of them should just go to France and dance under the moonlight. Honestly, with what he was telling her, it wasn’t going to matter what the environment was. Cierra kept forgetting that she was actually trying to fix him up. Not sitting in front of him trying not to grip both arms around him and bury her face in his neck with giggles.

Whoa, a new word. Deserve. The fact Cierra hadn’t made too much of her life really bothered her. The close people that had stayed probably had no idea what they meant to her. She tried not to remind them, but actions spoke more than words sometimes. Unless you were in this situation, in which case, they were pretty equal across the board. ”Deserve? You’re far too sweet.” Her heart was thumping so hard in her chest that she was just sure he was hearing it. It felt like it was more in her throat. Like the loud bass of a car. Speaking of deserving, she was wondering what ever happened to deserve Cas in her life. This was so wonderful. Whenever she dreamed, she never even imagined that it would ever feel like this. It wasn’t done either. So why she tried to mention herself different was stupid on her part. But it was better she got that over with now instead of later.

She kept her eyes down and avoided his gaze the entire time. There wasn’t one part of her that wanted to see the realization in his face. The thought process continuing on with a couple of to see what she meant. Or worse there would be confusion in his face and he wouldn’t understand what she meant. So she’d have to elaborate. That would just make her beat red and a mess. Any other sane person would have kept any insecurities to themselves and accepted it with a brisk happy nod. Then worry later. She was going to end up doing both. When she finished, she felt there was more in her throat but she kept her gaze down. Before she knew it, her attention was grabbed by both hands on each cheek. Part of her wanted to push his hand with the sore shoulder down but she couldn’t move. Cierra forgot about the term breathing for a moment. He didn’t have any of the expressions she was worried about. She couldn’t tell the expression on his face. He shook his head and started. Everything she had been dreading a moment ago was still there, but it was lessening. It was just so hard for her to believe something like that. Each nickname was going to kill her though. Cierra was afraid of challenging indirectly his words, but nodded, smiling weakly. The smile grew when he mentioned he was a lot to deal with. Cas was less than he thought. It also could have been Cierra having the perfect personality to deal with that kind of thing. She was in the process of opening her mouth to argue or make a point to make sure that Cas understood completely what she meant, but he beat her to it.

I love you Cierra

All of those thoughts just dropped from her mind at once. There was no way she heard that right. All of her fantasies and daydreams in the world didn’t compare to this. The emotional girl started reaching a sparkling shine in her eyes that was forming tears. But a smile was across her face as she blinked them away. ”I love you too.” The words came out a lot easier than she thought. Anything that she had probably said to him that night. She thought she was going to be fumbling, but the words almost felt as if they belonged there. Like he had been waiting and finally got the moment to come out. This was it. There was no misinterpreting that. This was happening to her. This moment couldn’t have been more perfect to her. The insecure woman felt like she somehow in those movies she had been watching late night all month. Where was that camera?

Cierra watched him carefully. Here came his side of ‘but’. Both arms came down as he rubbed the back of his neck. What looked like nervous gestures. Her mind was trying to wander of what it could have possibly been. ”Yes?” She urged him gently, just giving him a hint that she was giving all full attention. He looked… very uncertain. There was something that was making her stomach twist by the way he hesitated. He spoke again and indeed her stomach knotted up. Oh yeah. She was speaking to a hunter. She tilted her head to the side a little curiously- almost like a gesture a new puppy might make. Her eyes went wider as she started to comprehend what he was about to tell her. He was going to explain he was a hunter. Oh goodness, he was going to explain that he hunted species like her! How was she going to hide any of this? What he was about to tell her she already knew, but she didn’t want to hear it come out of his mouth. They were enemies by nature. Her kind had done something to him. He killed her kind. Killed. She took a deep breath and tried to be a normal human about it, ”What is it exactly?” Oh goodness that was terrible. If he had any thoughts about her knowing, that probably gave it away. It could have been just her showing nervousness, but Cierra was paranoid about everything. She tried to keep calm, repeating those words over and over in her head, He loves you Cierra. He loves you. Give him that. And it was enough to keep her sitting still.

I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS

[/color][/size]
to say i'll be your lullaby singer[/font]
[/center]