turning point -- London

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] He rolled over with a groan, swaying his legs off the side of the couch before getting up. He shook it off and stretched, wandering to his kitchen in rather rumpled clothing. Not that it made much of a difference, really. Still, he wandered through, grabbing what he needed to make pancakes and bacon and starting on that. What better way to wake someone up then to breakfast in bed? Mew had let London take his bed while he took the couch. He was doing his best not to push things, because this took a certain way about it to ensure when his hooks were in, they stayed in. They weren't quite at that point yet, but close. That was what mattered. Mew probably could have gotten London in bed -- in a non-sleep kind of way -- long before now, but this had to be done right to keep London as a pet. Either way, he needed London to make the first move with this. That way, it was on him and all that. Easier, really. London wouldn't be able to blame him for going too fast or being pushy that way. This was something Mew did to manipulate quite a few in the past. And it always worked well. All Mew had to do was turn on the charm and keep it up until the person broke. Say and do whatever he had to in order to get what he wanted. Though... the blood had become so addicting it was making him think weird sometimes. It didn't make any sense, but Mew pushed it aside. It was nothing. Just a blood thing and nothing more.. had to be. Things had been going great these past few weeks. Things had to start happening soon. Mew started making breakfast -- which he couldn't eat -- and listened to make sure London wasn't moving around yet in the telltale signs of being awake. He wanted the food to be done first. After a little while, the food was done, and Mew got a tray out and put the food on with a glass of orange juice before starting towards his room. He gave a light knock on the door before he walked in. "London.." He called out, bringing the tray of food over to where the faerie had slept. He allowed a smile to curl over his lips as he looked at the faerie; feeling an odd moment of fondness. He shook it away from his mind, but let the look stay on his features. "Sit up, I made you some breakfast." He added evenly, offering out the tray to London and waiting to see what the faerie's reaction would be. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London simply slept very soundly in Lex’s bed, actually curling into the blanket a bit because it smelled like him. He loved his bed, the way he could fit in the middle of the huge bed. He wished the male and slept next to him last night, but he understood, well was starting to understand more about the male and well relationships in general. He could smell food and that only made him wake up a little more, but even when he knocked, he immediately shut his eyes, pretending to be asleep and simply heard him and yawned, rolling over onto his back as he looked over at the male then, seeing the breakfast. “You didn’t have to do that, hun,” he said and smiled, feeling warmth spreading throughout his chest, trying not to smile too wide, just feeling all too spoiled by the male.

London simply looked at him, unable to not have a certain pleased gleam in his eye, simply taking the tray and then grabbed the vampire’s hand and simply tugged at the male. “I want a kiss,” he said softly pouting before saying, “Because you are the most wonderful boyfriend in the world. I can’t believe you made me breakfast.” He simply kissed him before beginning to eat the food, the smells having made his stomach rumble just enough. He was always so surprised the male could cook this well, although he was right that he could easily mimic recipes, but even people who could eat food messed recipes up. Some people just could not cook even to save their life.

“Your bed was the comfiest thing on earth by the way, aside from you, of course,” he smiled, more flirtatious when they first began to date. He just wanted to cuddle him all the time and well secretly wanted him to make dinner and taste it. He had this major attraction to the male partially because he could cook. That thought made him blush lightly and then he realized he was really only wearing boxers, wondering if he should have worn more, “Is it alright that I only slept in my boxers? I don’t know how weird it is for you. I just want to make sure.” He felt like he might be overanalyzing now.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] Did Mew want to sleep next to London last night? Yes. All the levels of yes. However, he knew that it would have been too much of a temptation for him, and he wouldn't have been able to help himself from talking London into sex. Or leading it to that in actions, at least. But he needed it to be started by London. Had to be for things to work, to fall into place. Mew wanted this one to work all the way through. More then he'd care for others to, actually. Must be the blood. Had to be. Though London had a very compatible personality for him, and how could he just pass up on that? And London was pretty adorable all around. And those curls... mm. There was a shrug at London's words. "But I wanted to." He pointed out with a grin. It wasn't really a bother or anything. He'd been awake, and he was practising his cooking more and more. London was the taste tester with all of these things, so it worked out for both of them. Never too late to learn for something new. He'd also gotten a violin he was playing around with, too. For now the cooking was enough, and when London took the tray he didn't move away; wanting to know how he'd done this time around. Yet with the asking for a kiss and the pout, Mew smiled and leaned down to give that kiss; hearing the words first and feeling quite pleased with himself over the whole matter. Closer to his goal, and Mew knew it. His eyebrows lifted at the words of his comfy bed and he nodded. Yes, he had picked it out to be comfy... a luring sort of place to be, to stay in. All the better for him that way. "I'm glad it's comfy for you." He responded lightly, noting the blush. Then with London's next words about only sleeping in his boxers, Mew paused in motion, glancing over London quickly. Not that he could see anything with the blankets pulled up, of course. He chuckled at the rest of what London had said, though. And without a word, he simply stripped down to his own boxers and flopped down at the end of the bed. "Now we're both in only boxers. Nothing weird about it." He said with a grin and a wink. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London simply listened to him and smiled at his words, “Mmm, well thank you.” The words came out with a sort of smug tone because he had made him pleased through the use of food. He couldn’t help but be wooed even simply by the action of breakfast being made for him. He was definitely glad that the male had not denied him a kiss before he began to eat. He felt his heart flutter a bit to be honest. Every time the male even kissed him or touched his shoulder or anything, he felt a certain desire spike up in him. He felt that if the male left or forced him out, he would probably break, not wanting to think about that though so he moved onto eating some of the food.

London nodded as he bit into some toast and honestly really did not realize how hungry he was until half the plate was gone in a few moments and he forced himself to slow down a bit. He blushed, “Guess I’m really hungry.” He then watched him strip down, his eyes unable to fixate on anything else for a moment and blushed. “Mmm nothing weird at all,” he murmured and blushed then, feeling a bit of desire spiking up in him again and he simply kept it to himself. He wondered if the vampire could sort of tell when these moments of desire flared up, but he was far too embarrassed to ask. Part of him was also scared to screw up what they had, then again, he had that feeling ever since they started dating. He finally had a good relationship and he did not want to ruin it in some way. He thought that Lex was perfect and really did not suspect him of anything.

Within a few moments, he finished eating, having been slower in his eating, “That was delicious.” He smiled and simply then moved to get up, his leanly muscled upper half and small, pale legs now appearing from under the blanket. He took his plate into the kitchen, “Be right back.” He simply rinsed his plate in the sink before coming back and seeing him and simply tackled him, his arms wrapping around the male and hugging him with a cheeky grin. “Hey,” he smirked and kissed his cheek quickly.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] He was pretty proud of himself for thinking this up, for doing this and seeing how well it was working out for him. London's heartbeat had jumped a little -- his heightened senses could detect this -- and Mew was pleased, sure that what he was doing was getting him ever closer to his goals. Soon, he could feel it. It zapped all the way through him, and the rise of hormones in the air made him perk up; bask in it. It was a tease to himself, certainly. But Mew couldn't help himself right now. He liked the way it made him feel. It was so much more addicting the it normally would be for him. There was even the underlaying scent of blood in the air that curled through his system and only added fuel to the internal fire. The blood pulled at him, urged him onward more. He wanted to bite down, but he simply held himself back from asking. He'd been oh so careful. He had to keep it that way. So he simply let himself watch London eat from the corner of his eye, thoughtful and letting his mind wander. London was doing good on cleaning the plate up, so the faerie must have been pretty hungry. Good. Though the pace could make London sick if he didn't slow down. Mew almost made a comment about it, but noticed that the faerie had started to pace himself with any comment on it. So Mew kept quiet on it, letting London finish what he wanted to eat of it. Mew had to chuckle at the words of the male being really hungry, though. He . "I know what that's like." There was a grin. Mew had been making it seem like he took blood from banked bloodbags and wildlife thus far; though that certainly wasn't the truth. Yeah, he'd had to kill a deer and a lynx to do it, and empty out a few bloodbags and store some to make it look realistic.. but whatever it took. Then he was down to nothing but boxers and quite comfortable about it. It showed by the way he was acting and how he'd flopped down without covering up. He didn't have a problem with his looks. He'd had years to come to terms with his physical appearance. Not that it was bad to begin with, but everyone had something about themselves they'd like to change. Mew no longer gave it much thought, since nothing could be changed, obviously. Except he could probably starve himself and get terribly sickly-looking. He was already pretty slim formed anyway. Couldn't get more muscle, though as a vampire his strength was about age rather then his body. Which was good, for sure. Otherwise he might have been taken out by a territorial battle long ago. He couldn't help but instagate them, after all. It ran fierce through him; that need to dominate and win. To eradicate competition. Again the influx of hormones rising, and there was a very soft sound in Mew's throat at it. When London finished eating and spoke, Mew grinned. "Good, another meal to cross off as something I can make right." He said evenly. Then he noticed the faerie getting up and Mew's gaze fixated on London as the male went to take his plate to the kitchen. Mew checked out the faerie, then found himself biting his own palm to keep himself in place and focused. Drops of blood spilled from the punctures, and he wiped it off as the wounds started to heal over. Then London was back, tackling him and there was a light, surprised sound that rose from his throat, but he smiled and wrapped his arms around the faerie. "Hey." He responded right back at London, turning his face to catch those lips with his for a real kiss. And, of course, he was struggling not to do anything overly sexual. But he couldn't help a slight squirm; hips shifting just a little before he forced himself to calm. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London had never been someone hard to please, especially with someone who knew how to charm him. He was innocent minded, caring, and quite naïve. He was always one to trust someone until they gave him a reason not to. He had complete trust in the male, smiling as Lex said that he knew what it was like. His blush vanished after a moment, knowing that the male and him had plenty in common. He was surprised that two people could fit so well together, not even in just their relationship. The past few dates had been perfect and well, there was simply nothing wrong with them. He could not find one flaw and yet he did not want to. He felt like this would be an addiction he could not shake unless Lex did something horrible. He did not think he would do that to him, in fact he thought that Lex liked him very much.

London grinned at his words about being able to make another meal and did not even realize the male had looked at him. He never really noticed things too much unless they were kissing. He had to have everything put quite bluntly for him as far as attraction goes. He was getting used to flirting though, an art that he never really explored before until they had started to date. When he came back, he simply returned the kiss, smiling wide against the male’s lips, unable to help himself. His arms slipped around his neck, ending up moving into his lap just in time to feel the male shift and simply caught on slightly for a moment. Then again, he could be making it out more than he thought because he wanted it. He simply wondered if the male would make a move on him or if he had to, but this time he would be the first to say something.

Well, or do something. He felt a bit nervous about it, a blush spreading across his cheeks as he tried to speak, only struggled sounds escaping his lips. He then kissed him deeply and moved his hips against the male’s, unable to hide that he wanted the male. Now he even trusted him so what was there to lose? He bit at the male’s lower lips and then murmured after he felt like he could, “Can we…” He was beginning to ask and then couldn’t. He wanted him more than perhaps either of them knew. He couldn’t wait any longer though.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] Yeah, London was pretty easy to please, but Mew was still being careful, still doing what he could to worm his way in. And it was working; he could see that. The faerie was of the personality type to not see behind Mew's antics; to not notice what was actually going on and how he was being manipulated. It was why Mew liked to go after this sort of person. It was quite a feat to find one as London was now, so he wanted to hold onto that and get all he could from it. The faerie had trusted him so quickly, and Mew had kept up the facade longer to get that trust to become deeply embedded. To make it harder for London to ever want to go, even when Mew finally let on that he wasn't exactly what he appeared to be. Yet he never imagined that the truth of his feelings or lack thereof would ever been seen by the male. That was something that had slipped Mew's mind. They did work out pretty good aside from the dishonesty from Mew and the fact that he was using London. Other then that, this was a relationship that Mew could get used to. He was comfortable with this, and he wanted to keep it going. He was working on that and had been from day one. Because he knew just from that day he would want the faerie around for awhile. He could try to make it last a few years, even. That was the idea; what he was going for. He was just laying the groundwork down to get to there. It worked pretty well with humans and some other mortal species, though he'd never tried with a faerie before. Didn't seem to make any difference so far. Was going good, and he had London just where he wanted him. All was in place, and he was just waiting for the male to make the last few moves to cement it all in place. He went with the kiss, trying to tame the desire running high through him. It wasn't easy, and it almost went out the window with the sounds London made and the movement of hips against his with the deep kiss. There was a shudder that went through him, and he was fighting with the want to flip London over and go for it. It was a struggle, and for a minute he wasn't sure it was one he could win. Yet there was the biting to his lower lip and then the words that made his breath hitch in his throat. His pupils dilated. London was asking. It was all he could do to let his eyes sweep over the faerie's face and nod. Close enough; London was initiating it, and that was all Mew needed to go forward. "We can." The response was soft, and Mew was kissing London then, touching. Going slow to make it last, to do this right. Needing it to be good so the faerie would crave more and come back for it after. ------------------ le fade ------------------ Mew had made sure London came first, but didn't take long to get there after. Something seemed off in those moments though; like what he had been feeling was becoming empty. But Mew wasn't paying attention to it. He didn't want to mess with the aftermath of pleasure going through him. There had been little to the feeling he had while in the act. It was selfish, even the fact that he was trying to please London. He only bothered to do it because if the faerie liked it, he'd come back for more. Just another form of manipulation like what he'd been doing the entire time. His emotions held these things; all the cold cruel things that went through Mew during the relationship. All the dishonesty and disdain at London's foolishness in trusting a vampire of all things. Pathetic. But hell, Mew was getting something from it. He slid his hand over the faerie's side lightly; pretending. But really, he just wanted to shove London away and take a shower. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

For once, everything felt complete when they were having an intimate moment, he had never felt so attached to someone in his life. He was not sure what the feeling meant exactly, never having felt like this. Honestly, despite how slow the male had started off, it did not take that long for the male to push him to come and that was when he had lost everything. He knew he should not have and even tried, but in that moment of pure bliss, he had lost control. He fed off of the male even if it was only for a few seconds, but a few seconds. A few seconds changed his life and after that, he felt shock and did not move, letting the male finish in time.

Worthlessness, stupidity, coldness, faking, etc. All of these things were what he felt when he had fed off the male. He had stopped feeding almost instantly, not wanting the male to see but also because he could not believe this. The more and more it sunk in, the more and more he had felt what the male felt towards him. Tears built up at the edge of his eyes, feeling used, worthless, stupid. He could not move, feeling tears take over him, falling down his cheeks, his body starting to shake as he let his arms fall from the male. “You should have t-told m-me,” he felt his words shake and could not even look at Lex.

His chest hurt as his body shook a bit, pulling himself up after a moment, unable to breathe and stumbled to get his clothing, “I’m stupid. I know that now. I also know I don’t deserve anyone. It’s no wonder I’ve been single so long and then the first p-person....” He muttered the words as they came out soft, as if he was on the verge of breaking. Maybe he should be angry, maybe that was how everyone else was, but that’s not how London was. He simply felt the hurt literally in every way. His hands shook as he tried to tug all of his clothing on quickly. Tears continued to fall as he felt a certain sickness build up in his stomach. He needed to go, “Oh god.” He just immediately tried to sprint out of the room, feeling himself about to lose the contents of his breakfast.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] His eyes had closed for a few seconds, opening when he felt the way London was shaking, the faerie's arms fall away from him. Then he saw the tears and his eyebrows drew together in a moment of confusion. A crier? Then the words made him blink; trying to figure out what was going on. He'd forgotten about the fact that London could feed off of his emotions, and so it wasn't the first thing on his mind as he tried to piece together what was happening. Something didn't make sense here. What would he have needed to tell London? Everything had seemed to go well in his opinion. Did he miss something, overlook something he shouldn't have? He didn't want to mess up his chances of keeping the faerie around, but something certainly had London upset. This wasn't good. And when the faerie pulled himself up and stumbled for clothing, Mew frowned; going through everything that just happened in his mind. Nothing seemed very out of the ordinar-- that feeling. That odd emptiness that had struck him just before the end. Faerie. Bloody hell. "You fed off of me? You fucking parasite!" He snarled whipping the sheet over himself and not even hearing what London was saying at this point. It was falling on deaf ears, because for once in his no-longer mortal life, Mew felt exposed in a way he really did not like. His knuckles were white clutching the sheets, and he couldn't see anything but red as he stared. He couldn't really see through the haze of anger at this point; it wasn't working. In the back of his mind he realized that London was moving, he could hear the sounds of clothing being put on quickly. The last words did cut through the fog, and as London went to sprint from the room, something in Mew snapped. He didn't want the faerie to leave, to not be around anymore. The thought of it was upsetting, and he hadn't given any thought to the idea of it ever happening. But now that it was, Mew didn't like it. It was really bothering him, and he hadn't expected it. Yet there were rules to how he worked with all this, so he moved, using his all too quick speed to grab London before he got far; hands wrapping around the faerie's throat. But the normal thoughts of killing the person in the situation wasn't there. Anyone else and they'd already be dead right now. But Mew wasn't moving to make a kill. His hands dropped, shoulders slumped and he looked lost. "Don't go..." It was a whisper, and the emotions were real. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London had heard his words, turning his face away from the male even more as if the male had slapped him, only confirming that he had just used him. He felt like some sort of monster and a gasp had even escaped his lips from crying. He could not even apologize, too upset, too much in pain, it made him unable to talk anymore. He stopped what he was saying and let his feet take him, despite the feeling that his legs were about to give out from underneath him. He was trying to hold his stomach in, but the more and more he tried, the more he felt as if he was about to lose his stomach. All the breakfast he had earlier had become tainted by the emotions he had felt moments earlier. He should have seen this coming.

London gasped as he felt the male grab his throat, eyes widening in fear for a moment. He gripped the male’s wrists, feeling as if the male would kill him, then he was free, but he did not expect what the male was going to say. He looked at him and simply said, “B-but…” His eyebrows furrowed deeply, a few tears falling and all he could do was stare at the male. His trust had been violated and he was not sure whether to believe him or not. “I don’t know if I can. I don’t know if I can trust you anymore,” he said in his broken voice, but he did not try to run. He somehow felt as if the male was sincere, but this whole time he thought the male was sincere. He thought the male cared for him even and how could he be so trusting of the male when a few moments later, he gave him a reason not to.

“Why should I stay? How can I? I care for y-you and I still do but don’t you just want me just because you want something to serve you and something you can just use? I don’t want to be a part of that,” he explained, not really understanding where this was coming from in him, but he could not hide how he felt. He felt like he was on the verge of telling him he loved him, but after that, he wondered if he even loved the man for who he was. Where his mouth had opened, it now closed after he thought about it. Maybe he had been innocent for a while, but that was definitely starting to change.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] This was something that Mew hadn't seen coming; the want to let this all go and find a way to keep London from leaving. Anyone else who had ever been put in this position that wanted to leave was dead. Mew had never hesitated before. He hadn't any reason to. He'd never cared enough for anyone to just let them go, let alone want to try and... fix things. The idea of that seemed so strange to him. Mew didn't know quite how to deal with it. He'd said what had come to his mind in that instant of loss and confusion. Anything to keep London here just a little longer. None of this was making any sense to him. He had killed horribly and brutally for much less then what the faerie had done. Not only had London fed from him, but the faerie had made him feel vulnerable and exposed. How the hell could he even think about letting that just go? None of this was right. But he'd let his hands fall away, gave London that chance to run. Yet the faerie was still there, staring at him, and Mew stared back with uncertain eyes. The was too different, he was out of his comfort zone and it was messing with his head. He did not understand what just happened. looking back on it, there had been little things that might have made him wonder, but he just swept it all aside. Now it was all coming back to him in flashes, in bits and pieces. He heard London speak, but there were no words to say. He tugged at his hair, feeling strangely insecure. He didn't know how to fix this. Mew never had to before. This sort of thing just did not come up. It didn't happen, which why Mew had nothing to offer back, no words to soothe this. He couldn't figure out how he let it get to this; where he had started slipping. Was it because he'd waited too long to aquire another pet? He'd been attending to other pursuits previously.. More words to stomp into his thoughts, and he frowned. Something wild started to shine through; primal. "You're mine. I claimed you, you're mine." He insisted lowly, half to himself as he stalked closer to the faerie; reaching out again. Then he stopped dead in his tracks, a moment of clarity hitting him. "What did you do to me? What have you done!?" He recoiled, looking wounded for a minute. His breathing was rapid, his expression mutely panicked. His gaze was flicking everywhere but on London. Then finally, his gaze returned to the faerie. Something clicked, and it dawned on him what was going on. To a point, of course. It took second for him to move; press the faerie carefully against the wall. This kiss Mew aimed to give London was probing, prying; passionate. "You're starting to make me feel alive, human. You're starting to make me feel." His eyes were bright. "I don't want that to go away. I don't want to lose you." But he stepped away, waiting. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London listened to him, a bit startled when he said that he was his, as if he belonged ot him. He moved back after a moment as he saw him reach for him and simply shook his head, “I’m no one’s possession, Lex. I’m just me. I’m my own.” He was being more straightforward than he ever had been in his life. He felt his heart ache though, ache for the male in front of him, but nothing had persuaded him differently. He needed to learn to trust the male again, but it was hard, hard to trust him in that moment. Then the male was claiming he had done something again and he was scared, scared the male would get even more upset and try to kill him. He was tense for a moment, but he did not move, giving the male an opportunity to prove him wrong, to change.

London felt his breath leave him when Lex pushed him against the wall, scared he would hurt him, unable to hide the fear a little and then he kissed him. He melted into the kiss and relaxed, arms remaining at his side, afraid he was falling into his trap again. He felt tears again and couldn’t push aside the hurt, hearing him. “I need to feed. It’s the only way I can see what you’re feeling or even start to believe you’re telling me the truth. If you don’t want me to, I’ll leave,” he said, hating for it to come to this, but he had no trust left for the male. “I’m sorry for feeding on you before, but I couldn’t stop myself,” he said, finally apologizing. “I had no right to do that without you giving me permission,” he said and felt another tear roll down his cheek slowly.

London wanted to see his best friend, but knew if he did that the male would want to kill Lex and he couldn’t have that, even if the male were to fake and they would break up. “Lex…” He muttered and then said, “I l-lo..” He stopped then and didn’t finish and simply couldn’t, knowing he was saying something he needed to be more cautious on.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] He tensed when London moved back, wanting to be ready to catch the faerie again but struggling with the conflict that could come if he let the male go. Mew couldn't just keep London here like this for long without headache and upsetting himself over it. It didn't leave him with many choices, and certainly not any he'd had to decide on before. It had always been clean-cut before. They went astray or wanted out, and Mew killed them. Simple as that. It just wasn't so simple now, this time. He... felt things. Mew couldn't stomach the idea of killing London; the male mattered. Just little things that had done it, but in the grande scheme of it all, those little things added up. They mattered, they had purpose. They changed him. Mew could hear what London was saying, but the words went in one ear and out the other; nonsense. Mew wasn't giving up his thought-pattern over that fact, nope. In his mind, London was still very much his. There wasn't much more he could do that would claim someone more then what they'd just done. And before that, he'd been the first to bite the faerie, too. Mew was big on the primal, predator side of things. Of what he was. Then the other moment had come, and Mew could smell the fear in the air, the way it escaped from pores in the skin. It urged the animal in him to come out and play, but the other part -- the new feelings -- clashed against that and beat it down. It kept Mew from pouncing, biting down into the faerie. But the fear had tempted it close to the surface. Too close. The kiss caused London to relax, and that helped more then the faerie would ever know. Yet it was the words after that made Mew go still. London wanted to feed to see what was being felt. Mew swallowed in discomfort over the idea, but he understood why it had to be the way. At the apology for feeding the first time, Mew glanced away. "I shouldn't have called you a parasite. We both know that out of the two of us, that would be me.." He sighed, looked back at London when he heard his name being spoken. His head tilted slightly to the side at the way the male had muttered his name, and he inhaled quickly at the stopped words. He didn't deserve to hear that after what had occured. He exhaled slowly and extended his arms, pressing his palms against the wall on either side of the faerie. Mew leaned forward a little, bracing himself as he looked at London. This had to be done, no matter how he felt about it happening. So he swallowed his pride for the moment, knowing that if he didn't do this, then London would leave. Mew couldn't have that. "Feed." It was quiet, and he closed his eyes and waited for it, feeling once again vulnerable at having all that he was exposed through feeling to the male. But Mew had very real feelings that had come when he was with London, and he was sincere with what he'd said moments before. That would show up. (( bawhahaha; Disney's Beauty and The Beast "Something There" song came on when I was writing the end of this, and I was amused -- then Crossfade's "Cold" came on after that. dafuq pandora!? lmao xD )) template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London heard him and just remembered the moment he had been called that, listening to him, wanting to tell him no, that the male was not a parasite but he couldn’t argue. He could say that them ale could change, could become different than he was currently. He looked in the male’s eyes until he had almost said what he had. London felt his stomach churn, scared of what the words meant. Maybe he really was Lex’s, from the beginning. London simply kissed him gently, wanting to let him know he wasn’t going to leave, especially not when the male had just agreed to him feeding. He was only going to do it for a few seconds, to find out exactly what the male was feeling, needing some sort of confirmation.

London thought he was going to kiss him again when he leaned forward, but he didn’t and all he could do was hear him say that one word. He saw him close his eyes, knowing neither of them really wanted to see London for what he truly looked like. He began to feed off of the male, feeling all the good parts that one should feel, all the parts that were distorted before. He could also feel that the male was extremely uncomfortable, vulnerable even. That was the moment he pulled back , feeling more tears but simply smiled and slipped his arms around the male. “Thank you,” he whispered into his ear and clung to the male.

London felt more and more relaxed and not broken anymore. The male had exposed all he was to him and how could he be upset now? He simply was not the type to hold a grudge. He was as they say, a lover, not a fighter. “I love you,” he whispered then, able to say that now. He just hoped that would not mess everything up. Maybe those words were spoken to soon, but he had almost said them before. He needed Lex to know how he felt, needed the male to know that he would not leave.

[BARTHOLOMEW LEX RIVEN]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=style,width: 355px; background-color: #000000; border: solid 5px #333333; true] Mew knew what he was. Usually. He accepted that he was not a nice creature, that he was selfish and did things to suit himself. It wasn't something that Mew thought of often. He did not weigh the issues he had in his mind; he did not feel bad about what he was. Except in this instance, in small ways. But he was still a long way from where he needed to be to have any kind of healthy relationship, that was for sure. Feelings were starting to take hold, but it was a slow process. It did not happen as quickly as Mew would assume it did for humans. He had cut off his own emotions for centuries at a time when he went feral. There had been a few times -- for shorter periods -- where he'd just gone back to that. Less and less as time went by, but it was still very much a part of him. It was true that Mew didn't want to see the less then pretty faerie form of London while the male fed, so that was a part of why he closed his eyes. The other part? That was because he knew how much London would be able to feel from him, be able to see so much about him just from looking at those emotions alone. The act of letting London feed would lay Mew bare for judgement, and it wasn't something he had to deal with very often. Ryanna could dig at him if she really wanted to, but then again, she was the only one who had known him when he was human still. And Mew had changed so much from when he'd been human. It would be hard for most to guess at the kind of person that he had once been from knowing him now. London... he'd gotten a few glimpses. Quick little moments, but that was because the faerie brought it out of him. When the feeling of emotions being drawn from him came, his discomfort increased a little, but he tried to think on all those moments where he'd felt happy and alive around London. It was much easier now that he knew what he'd been feeling; now that he knew what was going on. Then he felt London's arms around him, heard the words as the faerie clung to him. Mew's eyes opened, and he slid the back of his knuckles lightly along the side of London's face. When the faerie said those three words, Mew shivered. "I'm still not a good person, London. You matter to me, but everything won't be better overnight." He stated, wondering why the hell he was even saying that, since it wouldn't help his case at all. The faerie seemed to bring something odd out in him, he supposed. After a moment, he stepped back. "What do we do now?" He asked, eyebrow raised. This wasn't something he'd had to go through before, after all. template by Delusional

[LONDON ZADE MORTMAIN]

London felt the back of his knuckles on his face, running down his skin gently, feeling like he was about to say something that would put things in perspective a little and they did. For once he seemed to be catching onto things, but part of him did not want to know. Part of him wanted to stay as innocent as he was forever. He heard his words, simply knowing he was right. Their relationship would have to be a work in progress. “ I know. I won’t leave, not ever. I promise. Well, until I die or if we break up, but I promise to be the best I can for you,” he whispered and simply spoke what he felt at that moment. He wouldn’t hid e how he felt, especially when he felt like he could not lose the male before him, even though he had be considering walking out that door about five minutes ago. Things could definitely change within a few seconds. If there’s one thing he learned just now, it was that anything can turn around if you work at it.

At the question of what to do now, he simply smiled and said, “Why don’t we go on a date? Well, if you want we can shower together first. The biggest thing is to live our lives and go with the flow. At least, that’s how I see it. We’ll figure out if something comes up along the way.” He looked into his eyes with a smile on his face, feeling something warm building up in him. He did have a few questions for him though and he simply asked, “Did you feel anything though? Anything true on our dates.” London’s smile slowly softened as he looked at the male, waiting for some answers. He knew that maybe the male had not, but he cared for him now and that’s really all that mattered in the end. He wondered how many times the male had done this before and then had it end badly. He did not want to bother the male with those questions though. It really was none of his business, their situation now is though. He just had to focus on what was happening at hand, which was something much greater than a few moments ago.